Women and Sexual Health

Good sexual health isn't just about sexual intercourse. Women should know that sexual health encompasses many other aspects like understanding how your body works, knowing what turns you on and what puts you off, accepting your sexual desires and sexual orientation, choosing a form of sexual expression that you are comfortable with, and knowing how to protect yourself from sexually transmitted diseases (STD s) and unwanted pregnancies.

Women should understand that sexual health begins with accepting your sexuality. Our earliest perceptions of sex are inculcated in childhood by our parents' and society's attitude towards it. Until recently, talking about sex was taboo. So, children, especially females perceive that sex is not a good thing. They hear the disapproving voices discussing homosexuality and they subconsciously register that as well. These false ideas infiltrate into adulthood and can be a mental hurdle to good sexual health. It could lead to feelings of shame or guilt when indulging in sexual activities, a reluctance to fully explore sexual potential, or a negative approach to sex. Your sexuality is an integral part of who you are. By accepting your desires, women can positively enhance their sexual experiences and create a healthier self-image.

As a women and an individual, you should never indulge in anything you are uncomfortable with, especially when it comes to sex. Putting up with sexual activities that hurt, embarrass or humiliate is just plain wrong. If you know what you want from a sexual relationship, and you understand what excites you and gives you pleasure and what doesn't, it empowers you to control your sexuality and choose a form of sexual expression that you are comfortable with.

Good sexual health also means protecting yourself from sexually transmitted diseases (STD s). Women can talk to a trusted gynecologist regarding any fear, doubts and inhibitions they may have. Learning about the various types of STDs and how to prevent them, knowing how to determine if you have one, and what to do if you are infected, is a very important aspect of sexual health. Women should have complete knowledge about STD's to prevent them from any heath risk.

Sexual health is as important as physical or mental well-being. Women can better the quality of their life by fully exploring and understanding their sexuality.

Good health is not a struggle, nor it is an extraordinary feat. Healthy living is about understanding what your body needs and what is good for it. Re-discover good health in a simple way with Tania Hackner and make good health a way of living!.For more information and advice on General health please visit us at What You Need to Know [http://www.whatyouneedtoknow.co.in/].

Online Relationship Counseling - Asking Your Therapist For Help

Counseling has been a profession for a long time now. As society grows, so do the problems that it faces. With so many connections and relationships, it is inevitable that people will face problems. To sort out these problems, one may or may not need professional help. Generally speaking, people feel that family and personal problems should remain within the home itself. This line of reasoning is not only old-fashioned but rather more devastating to the family as on is literally shutting out any avenue for help with which one could probably save their relationship. This is where online relationship counseling helps those people who are reluctant to go visit counselors physically.

Visiting counselors for help is quite the norm these days, but what does one do if they feel reluctant or maybe sometimes even shy in visiting a counselor. Online relationship counseling is the safest avenue they can take and was basically designed to provide a sense of security and privacy to people who would rather not visit a counselor physically. Since, providing the real details of your identity is not a must online, many feel that it is safe and private.

Online relationship counseling may be the latest brainchild of the Internet, but as always there are many flaws and issues one has to address before planning a counseling session online. The basic issue is of authentication. The Internet is a haven for scams and lies and one has to take care in choosing which site one would like to enroll with for their sessions. As it goes, counseling sessions are costly and for the money that one spends for the sessions, so one expects quality. To ensure this, one has to do some research before one settles for a site. The first thing one has to ensure is that the therapists on the website are renowned counselors. Many counselors, who also run clinics, provide online counseling sessions for renowned websites.

Each website provides records and credentials of the therapists that work with them and these are easily accessible from the website. What one needs to do is to check these credentials and try to ensure their legitimacy by checking the directories that are maintained by the State and which contain the list of al professionally practicing counselor. Another technique is to look into the testimonials and reviews that are left with each site as record of proof of successful counseling sessions. A counselor should be well experienced in all forms of mental health fields such as physiology, psychiatry, chiropractic and naturopathic medicine, marriage and family counseling. A counselor should always provide impartial advice and a counselor who immediately suggests divorce as the last option is best worth changing. Read more at http://www.savemarriagecounseling.com

Online relationship counseling may be a new concept but it has been found to be very successful with mostly young couples who feel shy in visiting a counselor physically. Though each session may not be successful, counseling has been found to help. A little sacrifice from each party could literally do wonders for the relationship.

Find out more information about relationship and Marriage Counseling at => http://www.savemarriagecounseling.com

Footprints In Cyberspace - Are You Following Bad Advice From False Gurus?

Grab your favorite beverage and get ready to have your life and business changed for the better, starting right now. This article is about Internet Marketing with a consience, and I have some advice for you that you will either completely agree with, or you may call me a "goodie two shoe" marketer", whatever that is...

One of my favorite sayings is: "Be wary of giving advice, wise men don't need it, and fools won't heed it". Obviously I must be a fool, because I try to advise people in the hopes of breaking through some mental barriers and changing a life. However, this article is meant to inspire you to greater heights with your business using some of the sagest advice I've ever heard.

There is a wealth of knowledge to be gleaned from the religious texts of this world. There is one story (parable) that strikes me as relevant to the philosophy of marketing with integrity and that is the story of the Footprints in the Sand. I will paraphrase the story to avoid mis-statements and will strive to keep the general message clear.

In the parable of Footprints in the Sand a person sees his life as footprints in the sand. When times were good, and thing were going well, there were 2 sets of footprints. One was the man's footprints, and the other was his Ally (again, paraphrasing here). At times there was only 1 set of footprints in the sand, and this represents the tough times in the man's life when he experienced strife and pain. The man said to his Ally, "Why is it that when times went bad for me there was only 1 set of footprints in the sand? Why did you abandon me when things were going poorly? I thought you were my Ally!" His Ally responded, "it was during those times of your greatest need and your greatest pain that I carried you...that's why there is only 1 set of footprints in the sand".

When times are tough, it seems like your friends disappear and your calls don't get answered. When times are tough it seems like you are all alone and with nobody to lean on for support. When you're slugging it out in the trenches trying to find what works for your business and your family members are telling you to stop wasting your time with internet marketing, you are not alone! It's times like this when you know who your real friends are and that your greatest Ally has never left you, ever.

What can your greatest Ally be with regards to doing business online? Integrity can be your closest Ally, if you follow this way of thinking. Integrity begets self-esteem and these 2 Allies (integriy and self-esteem) will be there with you and for you through the toughest of times, even when everyone and every thing seems to have abandoned you.

Now, this article is about marketing with integirty, which makes me want to dispel a few myths that are widely propagating my internet marketing gurus. Have you ever heard the old marketing adage "Fake It 'til You Make It"? It's probably one of the worst pieces of marketing advice I have ever heard.That's the advice many gurus and coaches are giving their close friends who start Internet marketing. They tell their underlings or mentoring students you must position yourself as an expert in order to be looked up to as a knowledgeable person in the field of XYZ, whatever it is they're selling.

This makes sense on the outset, because the "newbies" look up to the gurus. The weak admire the strong. The unhappy see the happy folks as having the "secret" The dumb kids in class think the smart kids know everything about everything. People look to the alleged experts for advice, but are they getting expert advice? Here's a common example of something that happens every day:

People join network marketing companies for opportunities thinly disguised as products for sale. The typical scenario with most network marketing companies, especially the wealth and health-related ones, is that they say, "we have great products here that really work....but you could attain health and wealth if you promote the opportunity, too". That is rubbish! Try the products and see if they work to achieve integrity with your marketing. Don't sell the dream, sell the reality (albeit with an emphasis on WIIFM, what's in it for me).

Before promoting a product, find out if they work for you. Did they actually help you? If so, enjoy marketing that opportunity with integrity. Your enthusiasm will shine through and your optimism will increase your sales. You will become an Internet marketing success simply by having some integrity. However, if you "Fake It 'til You Make it", then you're following what everyone else does. You are a false prophet, guru, marketer, or whatever you want to call yourself. If you follow this bad advice, you join the incestuous world of the blind leading the blind.

I also predict that you will end up a very dissatisfied person and marketer, if you follow this way of thinking. Will you really enjoy the type of success that comes with selling the un-reviewed and untested product/dream? I guess you could if you're at rationalizing your behavior. Just remember that karma is going to take a big bite out of your rear end if you follow this no-integrity marketing philosophy.

Do you have integrity?

You will become a larger person in a spiritual sense if you do...
You will become more successful if you do
You will separate yourself from other businesses if you do.

Do not "Fake It 'til You Make It"... and do not take this piece of advice. There's no integrity in it.

This brings me to the next piece of "conventional wisdom that rubs me raw, gets under my skin, is false, yet is widely propagated by gurus and marketers everywhere. The next cliché/fallacy is "content in King". Content is merely words on paper, recorded voices, and bits and byes on web pages. Good content is King, Queen, Empress, Emperor, Tsar, Tsarina etc.... Good Content comes from Good Sources. Good Sources are borne via their single set of Footprints in the Sand. The trials these Good Sources go through to attain their expertise forge their integrity. This makes them true experts, and makes them believable. Their words have power because they come from a good source.

Have you ever heard the expression, "consider the source"? This is usually said about someone that cannot back up what they say, and whatever they write, or speak, it's taken with "a grain of salt". Like we examined in the first example above of "Faking It 'til You Make It", this type of person is not believable because they cannot attest to the truthfulness of the statement they put forth. They haven't lived it, breathed, or experienced it. They're faking it by telling you what they think you want to hear.. Good Sources create Good Content which leads to good income!

Here's an example of how good content is always the winner. There are people making 6-figure incomes from blogs simply by reviewing products they tested and wrote reviews for on their blog. They are experts at what they do, they're considered authority figures in that niche, and they worked hard to get there. However, if they write a favorable review just to get some sort of kickback or affiliate commissions, they won't see too many repeat customers or get repeat traffic to their blogs.

They will have burned their bridges and they "sold their soul for a donut hole" if they make an unreviewed recommendation for the sole purpose of profit. They risked their reputation by writing about something about which they knew nothing or they gave a favorable review for something just for some quick bucks. What they lost was everything, expert status, repeat customers, respect, and yes, integrity. What they gained was a donut hole. Nothing.

Good content in king and it comes from good sources who spent years attaining their expert status. I want you to be a leader some day and you can do this if you make you are willing to see a single set of footprints once in a while. If you want to play follow the leader temporarily that's OK, too. Just follow the right leader, i.e. a Good Source

Which brings me to the next piece of advice from gurus that gets under my skin, which is: "If you do exactly as I tell you, you are guaranteed to succeed" That is so not true! Yes, there are certain basic fundamentals that everyone needs to succeed in life and business but anyone can tell you these basic steps. This type of information is freely available on the Internet and is valuable if coming from a good source. However, the one thing I have experienced is that many mentors and gurus will tell you to follow their footprints to success and do what they did to succeed. This doesn't work because you need to make your own Footprints in the Sand and you need to develop as a person.

I've been through 2 paid-for coaches and 1 coach who gave advice freely. This is my experience with this, and there's no greater teacher than experience. The more I paid these coaches, the better the advice was. However, everything of value that I learned came during the times when there was only a single set of Footprints in the Sand. Late nights slaving away at web pages, web sites, writing articles, content creation, Help Desk tickets etc... Those are the times when I learned something nobody could take away from me. I learned from expereince what my true strengths were, and what it was that I really wanted to do. Looking back at those miserable times of frustration and failure, I can see their worth.

The intestinal fortitude required to get through those times was created with a single set of footprints in CyberSpace. The lasting effect these times had on me resulted in footprints in cement that molded me into what I am today. Today, I consider myself a Peaceful Warrior who knows that the real battles are fought on the inside. There was a book given to me called The Way Of The Peaceful Warrior by Dan Millman. He emphasizes this point and many others. Here is another example of where his true wisdom shines: When he talks about a healthy diet, he doesn't say, "be a vegetarian" or "don't eat this, that or the other thing". He admits that even he doesn't know your body like you do, therefore all he can advise is a healthy balanced diet and some daily exercise.

Only you know what will work for you, and the wise ones know this and will tell you this. That's why when you hear a guru or coach say, "Follow my cut-and-paste blueprint for Internet riches" you must be wary of the product or program. You have to make your own success happen, nobody can do it for you and it won't work if it doesn't align properly with your likes, dislikes and talents. Your battle is not a lack of knowledge nor a lack of tools. Your battle is within and only you can find your way out of the swimming pool that represents "everybody else". To break way from the pack, to become hugely and truly successful, you need to walk "alone" for a while, and a good coach can be your Ally here, if you choose wisely.

Here is another example of why you should not follow a strictly defined avenue to success. Have you ever heard of Bruce Lee? He's one of the most advanced martial artists of all time. Many of his teachings are still ahead of our time and one thing he is credited with inventing is a martial art called Jeet KuneDo. Loosely translated, Jeet Kune Do means "the way of no way". This became a hugely popular "art form" and people were successful with it even though it defied some long standing philosophies taught by other martial arts schools. But it works well for those who try it because it plays to their strengths. This martial art is no better than any other. Other art forms may be exactly what people are seeking or other art forms could emphasize certain aspects that practitioners can "dial into".

"Follow me and do exactly as I say to succeed" doesn't work well unless you're exactly like the mentor teaching you, an extreme rarity in this world filled with 100% unique people, talents, and strengths. Your single set of Footprints in Cyberspace is the Way of No Way, the True Path to Your Success. "Do whatever gets the job done and gets you from point A to point B." That is the way of the Dan McGonagle and it can be your way, too.

Here's another popular saying that I have to disagree with: "You will become poor as a marketer teaching people how to fish. Sell the fish" To me, that equates to selling incomplete solutions to people. This means offering something that doesn't really address the need but simply emphasizes the need for yet another product. There are a lot of marketers doing this because this is what sells. Aspiring marketers give people what they want and what they seem to want the most. This is justified by some when they say: "Hey, it sells, I'm just giving them what they obviously want. If I don't sell it to them they'll buy it form somebody else..."

How is this different from the rationale employed by drug dealers? Don't they use the same rationale? Don't they sell whatever seems to sell well without regard for their customers? I am pretty confident in saying those people don't lead normal peaceful lives. I am pretty confident in saying they only enjoy momentary happiness with their proceeds. I am also pretty confident that their businesses are not built for the long haul.

It's considered good marketing to "upsell" and "side sell" people and I realize that, and I do it. There isn't one product that you're going to find that will address all of your needs right away. However, the real goal here is to have your product benefit your customer in some way, and for the product to deliver as promised, and to live up to the words on the sales page.

Here's another way to become successful as an Internet marketer and how to become a true expert. This is so simple yet many people don't do it because it seems like work. If you follow this integrity-laced marketing method, you will succeed in ways you never imagined. What's the method? Simple.. Try the product before you recommend it. How many marketers actually experimented with the products they're touting in these massive product launches you see every so often? Every time that I bought a product that was highly touted by gurus in some product launch, I bought from them based on their reputation.

If the product was a piece of junk I voted my disapproval with my unsubscribe button. Being the type of person that I am, I wait for the hype to subside before I recommend, or don't recommend a product to my readers. I'm busy implementing the strategies outlined in these products and am actually reviewing these products before I make a decision on it. There's a danger to doing this though... When the hype subsides and the fever pitch is gone, you stand less of a chance to make sales because the best time to "make sales" is during the product launch. If you end up recommending the product after testing it first, your conversion rate will be less. You also risk the chance of seeming like a Johnny-come-lately who isn't "with it". In the long run, you gain from this by building a relationship with your list based on trust.

For example, there was a product launch recently for an AdWords product that really was very good. I was lucky to get an advance copy of the report and suggested some changes to be made to it since it was missing a few key elements. Product owners don't like to hear that their products are lacking in any way therefore they didn' t make the changes. So I made up for what I considered the missing information in that report by writing a 2 page report filled with tips on AdWords and pay-per-click marketing. I didn't make a ton of sales for this product but I also felt happy with what I did.

What is going to last longer for you, money or satisfaction with yourself? If you answer correctly, you will have a constant ally in any tough times you face, and eventually you will have what most marketers desire: a following. Money comes and goes quickly, but satisfaction with self lasts forever. Moving forward, I now have the basis for my own product on Adwords. Right now it's only 2 pages long, but as I gain new experiences my knowledge increases and soon I will have the basis for a complete solution that I can put out there in my name as a true expert, with no stones left unturned.

There are too many people faking it, and too many marketers selling what they don't understand. Market with pride and integrity and you will always have an ally. Footsteps in Cyberspace isn't all about integrity or getting through hard times due to poor sales or a lack of progress. It is really the way business should be conducted everywhere. The longer you practice "integrity marketing" the more knowledgeable you become. The more knowledgeable you become, the closer you come to being an Expert. The closer you come to being an Expert, the closer to a real Guru you become. When you are a true guru at something, you will realize that the path to your success was paved by your footprints, but you were never alone, not ever.

Remember what integrity marketing and Footprints in Cyberspace is all about and remember that adhering to these principles will get you to the top. You will deserve every ounce of your success if this is the path you chose.

Here's another cliché that I'm about to destroy: Good Guys Finish Last... Not TRUE. Good Guys And Gals Finish First Every Time. Here's why: Have you ever heard of the 80/20 principles that 20% of your efforts will bring 80% of your income? Let's put this into real world perspective, into words marketers understand: You'll make 80% of your income from 20% of your list, 20% of your marketing efforts, 20% of your websites, 20% of your web pages, products etc..

How do you get more of the 20% accomplished, what is the 20% and where does it come from? It comes from being real with people, form being nice to people, and from establishing a real connection with people. Can this be accomplished by creating really good products? Yes, but how many people do you know that have unread or unopened digital products on their computers?

How many marketers have received the following email: "Hi, I'm really interested in buying your product, will it really help me? I'm on a fixed income and have been trying for 2 years without much success. What do I do and where do I start?" Etc.... Once in a while it pays to send this person a freebie, a free product. Seriously, it costs you nothing to email them a complementary product, right? Does this mean you give away all your products? No, that would be stupid and not everyone appreciates free stuff, because they abide by the old adage that "you get what you pay for".

Give away an occasional free copy of one of your products to gain good faith. Every once in a great while this type of person turns into a raving fan and becomes one of your 20%. Stupid idiot moron marketers finish last, not Good guys and gals. Another way to get more connected with your readers and listener sis to encourage participation, via surveys, teleseminars, webinars, whatever you want to call them. You can also personalize your message to them. Use the word "you" a lot. Use it without actually saying it. Make the reader or listener feel like you are actually talking to them.

Which sentence works for you best? "Hey anonymous group of people I sell stuff to, buy this" or "Hello Daniel, How are things going? We got buried with snow this weekend up here in Boston and my back is hurting for certain. Anyways, Daniel there is a new report out about XYX by PERSON'S NAME that is pretty good. I recommend you take a look at it if you need to get traffic to your sites quickly and easily. Daniel, if you live in a warm climate, please keep me in your thoughts and have a nice cold drink for me. We're about to get 8 more inches tomorrow. Here's that link again it's a pretty good read and a very comprehensive guide to traffic generation for an expert in the field. Thanks, Personal Message Sender"

That's how you get your 20%,and that's how Good Guys and Gals Finish First. Please remember though that if your product is under 9 dollars and people are stressing out about that, then they are probably never going to succeed. There is a whole heck of a lot more money that they're gonna have to spend and a lot more "frogs to kiss" before they "get it". That's if they ever get "it"...

Here the last piece of widespread advice that is commonly propagated: "Shoot for the stars, aim high" OK, Mr. Guru, I'm going to aim high like you said. Now me, a person with little or no business skills, is going to aim high and shoot for the stars.. Ready? I'm gonna make $50k/month in 3 weeks by making money online. That's right, me. I have little or no business skills, have never run a business before, don't even know what a business is, but I'm gonna do it because you tell me it can be done if I just aim high enough..."

Shoot for the stars? Aim high? Are you kidding me? Show me someone who has achieved this gargantuan success with little or no developed business skills and I'll eat every bit and byte of this article.... Aim high? No Set realistic goals? YES You see, this is the setup that they're framing you for. If these legends of marketing tell you its possible, and it doesn't happen for you like they described, it must be your fault, right? After all it worked for them, was easy for them, and seems like it was effortless for them to produce these results, if these results actually occurred for them. Maybe you need another product that will do it for you then.

That's the hook. They tell you anything is possible and quickly if you only aim high enough, and if you believe this tripe, then their next sales page will convert better for them. Here's what you're not being told (by the way you'll realize this on your way OUT of the swimming pool, but not while you're in it swimming around aimlessly): Their results are based on Having huge lists, cultivating their lists, possessing good business skills, writing a good email to that list and having great copy on their sales pages or web sites.

How do you get the success the obviously enjoy or purport to enjoy? Let's break it down one by one: Huge lists are built up over time Cultivating their lists means there is a relationship they nurtured over time Writing a good email to that list is a skill obtained over time. Having great copy on their sales pages or web sites is also skill obtained or purchased. Don't shoot for the stars. Instead, set realistic goals and achieve them. Do this enough times and you will have achieved a larger goal with even noticing it.

One saying that many good coaches have is that you should treat big success like "eating an elephant", And how do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time, not all at once. Sound ridiculous, but there's wisdom in those words. I know, I've been there. Here's my evolution as a newbie who turned into a true entrepreneur. As a newbie, I was lucky to have one "failed" offline business under my belt. That was my high school diploma for business in the real world. I made my first few dollars online somehow, through trial and error and perseverance through about 20 different programs (single sets of footprints in Cyberpsace).

I earned more money, but got stuck trying to see which business model works best for me, which required more trial and error (single sets of footprints in Cyberpsace) After that I became an intermediate marketer making a full time income online but with no idea how to make more of this "success". At this point I considered myself an intermediate marketer and got some coaching but these coaches taught their styles and blueprints. At this point I learned that I have to do what works for me, and its not anything those mentors were doing.

Now, as an advanced marketer I have discovered the secret to 7-figure annual and 5-6 figure monthly income and am pursuing that ideal. Hmm, funny how the end goal was to get to a 7-figure annual salary but I didn't get there until I set, met and achieved realistic goals. I am so glad I set realistic goals and took bite size chunks of reality!

Here's another real-world example that I would like to share: I ran 2 consecutive Boston Marathons. Well actually it was more like I ran/walked them. Your path to success is very much like a marathon. It is a journey, not a race. When I got the idea into my head to run a marathon, I had little experience running long distance. The longest distance I had ever run was 5 miles, and I got up to 12 miles before I ran my first marathon with my friend Chris. I ran/walked my way to the finish line in under 5 hours, not bad for a first timer. When I got to the finish line, I was prouder of myself than I had ever been in my life. I reached my goal, but the arrival at the finish line wasn't my reward.

My reward was the journey and what it taught me about myself. I learned a little bit more about myself every time I went from walking to running again. My reward was the "measure of the man" that was taken during those grueling hours on the road. There is no greater reward than gaining a true sense of yourself during the trying times. Your reward is waiting for you in the single set of footprints Your reward will be life-changing, like mine was for me. Your success lies in the single set of Footprints in Cyberspace.

When I ran the Boston Marathon, I did it to raise money for charity. I raised over $500.00 and had the support of my family, friends, and co-workers. However, during the long 26.2 miles that I endured, that support was meaningless to me. I could not count on their support to urge me forward, or to get moving again. There was only a single set of footprints then, and it was only due to my Ally that I got through the race. The euphoria of finishing my second marathon didn't last as long as the first, but to this day, the experience has changed me forever.

Now, there are some warnings I would like to give you here. Running extensive miles on a body that is not used to running those types of distances will do damage to your body. I wasn't really prepared to run this race, and my knees suffered some permanent damage from asking too much of them in a short time frame. I don't mind though, because every time my knees act up I'm reminded of why they are so rickety, and how they got to be in such bad shape.

Another one of my favorite sayings is: "The unexamined life is not worth living." It's during the times of the single sets of footprints that we examine who we are as people and what we're really made of. There's no passing or failing grade here, you simply take measure of who you are. Set realistic goals and achieve them, then move on. Running 2 marathons with little experience wasn't very realistic, but the little experience I had helped me to the finish line. Since I tried to do too much with a body that wasn't prepared for it, my knees suffered, but I managed to finish the race, and you get to your finish line if you set realistic goals.

I'm from the Boston, Massachusetts area and we had something going on called the Big Dig, a multi-billion dollar construction project that was the first of its kind to have ever been done. There was a sign that greeted the passersby where they were most likely to see it and it read: "Rome wasn't built in a day. If it was, we would have hired their contractor". Your online empire will not be created overnight, but it will be created, have no doubts about that. I would not have been able to write to you about my experiences and my reality had I not taken my own Footprints In Cyberspace.

Thank You Ally, Integrity, and Reality, and Thank You for reading this. It means a lot to me that you read this whole article. If you enjoyed it or would like to leave some feedback, please visit http://danielmcgonagle.name

Daniel Mcgonagle is an entrpeneur who gives real-world advice. His Marketer's Relief is a comprehensive membership site with a built in traffic generation system. Join here at http://marketersrelief.com for the free traffic or for the 1400 marketing video tutorials and products there.

Grow Your Relationship - Taking it to New Heights

Do you long to grow your relationship and take it to new heights? Are you ready to make a man fall in love with you? Do you want a real relationship? If you are looking for a real relationship and you want to grow your relationship into something special then you will want to follow these steps to taking your relationship to new heights.

Be the best you that you can be.

The best that you can be often requires a bit of work on your part. You need to spend some time reflecting on yourself. Then take what you learn and work on being a better you then you were before. This often means working on living a healthy lifestyle as well as working on your mental and emotional health. It is always a good idea to get some self help books for improving your mental state of mind.

Touch his heart.

After working on you, you can work on your time with him. You need to touch his heart. This can be done in a few ways. First you should have fun with him. Make your times together enjoyable. This will produce good feelings and good memories. Then you should work on being his friend. Be there for him when he needs someone to talk to or a lean on. This is very important and you can not grow your relationship without touching his heart. This is one of the most important aspects of falling in love.

Go at his pace.

You need to be willing to go slow. Guys are rather slow moving creatures, especially when it comes to matters of the heart. Work carefully to take things slow and you will make it a lot easier for him. Don't make him feel pressured. You will also want to work at keeping the relationship light and light hearted. Now isn't the time to get all serious!

You can grow your relationship and take it to new heights. First you need to work on you. Then you need to work on touching his heart. Finally you must go slow. You can do it though!

Imagine what if you could make any man adore you, chase you, love you, and commit to you? Click Unforgettable Woman Advice and learn 77 Secrets that ninety percent of women have never heard. You have got to see this!

This article is contributed by Tina Jones. Tina is part of the Unforgettable Woman Publishing Team. She works together with founder Alexandra Fox and writes dating/relationship articles for women who want to understand male psychology, how to attract men, and find true love. You can find more about Unforgettable Woman Publishing by visiting their website.

The Power to Create - Stop Self-Sabotaging Your Relationships!

You have heard the excuses or even said them yourself. You know the ones like, " I want you to be happy", " I don't want to get hurt", or even "I don't want me or you to settle". The purpose of self-sabotage can sometimes appear to be even noble, that usually means trying to avoid the hurt & pain that comes with the joy & love in relationships. The purpose of self-sabotage can sometimes appear to be even noble, that usually means trying to avoid the hurt & pain that comes with the joy & love in relationships.

Sorry, folks, but all of the above goes hand in hand in relationships. Overcoming past hurts and even embarrassments takes a lot of inner strength because one has to deal with the truth about not only others, but themselves. Learn to be fair to yourself and to be fair to those you love and....that love you back. Beginning anew is not easy to do. So before venturing into the new, make sure you have a handle of the old. Be sure that you are ready to become involved in a relationship before you begin a new one. If you are already in a relationship and it's recognized by you or your significant other that you are pushing your loved one away, then seek out to discover how you can break the cycle of self-sabotage & begin the journey of self discovery. Recognize that you have the POWER TO CREATE. So what do you want to create for yourself, your relationship, your family? Want to exercise your POWER now? Here are some helpful tips to start you on your way to bringing anew :

1. Begin to journal. Writing down your thoughts and reflect monthly to recognize your progress of your healing process.

2. Talk to your significant other about what they see. Don't push if they don't feel comfortable or unable to give you any feedback. That's OK, and beginning the discussion will at least let your loved one know you care and want to be a better companion, person, etc. It can create a world of positive possibilities.

3. Recognize your own power in creating a happier, healthier you. Take ownership of your well- being and the well-being of your relationship.

4. Don't be shy, if needed or wanted, seek help from a trained professional. You should take care of your mental health and well-being like you do your physical health.

5. Above all else, try not to place a timeline on your healing process. The effort of overcoming years of pain and self-doubt takes time. The journey of self-discovery is a life journey.

Neek, the Love Coach

Sex, Relationships & the Love in Between....

2009. All rights reserved.

Talena C. Queen is Neek,the Love Coach,relationship coach and owner/operator of Couchtime.net, is delivering dating & relationship advice for the 21st century that is "Straight with NO Chaser"! "Let's talk about what turns you on &..off." The Love in Between....it's about the love of self, others & life! Tune in and call in every other Wednesday at 11pm (EST) beginning August 19, 2009. Talk to Neek, the Love Coach.....

To keep updated on all of Neek, the Love Coach happenings, visit her website at http://www.couchtime.net

Advice For a Broken Heart

Your significant other just told you your relationship is over. Or, you found out your spouse cheated on you. You didn't expect it coming and you feel broken inside. What do you do?

When you suffer the loss of a relationship, it can be very similar to a death. You need to grieve and go through the stages of grief. Everyone goes through these stages in different ways and it takes varying amounts of time. Give yourself the space and time you need to get to a better place. Here are some signs to look for and some tips to get through this difficult time.

1. Shock and denial. You just can't believe it! You di't expect it or, if you knew there was trouble, you didn't think it was that bad. Your first reaction might be to refuse to believe it or you might just be numb and don't know how to react. Either way, you need to let it sink in. Ask questions or get answers if you need to but make sure that you take some time alone to think and reflect. This will allow you to adjust to your new reality and may prevent you from taking actions you may later regret.

2. Anger or bargaining. Everyone will get to this stage at different times but you WILL get there. It is OK to feel anger -sometimes you will deserve to feel anger! The question is, though, what are you going to do about it? Someone once told me that you cannot help your emotions but you can help what you do about them. My advice is to step back and think things through. If there is any chance of saving your relationship, the worst thing you can do is to take negative actions. Do not text or call the other person 100 times a day. Do not follow them, stalk them or harm them or their property in any way. Not only is this not helpful to your mental health but it can be a crime. Do not beg them, throw yourselves at them or bargain for a future together. This only turns people off and does not make you feel good about yourself.

3. Retrospection and constructive actions. Some people get this, some people don't. It is now time to think about how and why this happened. Sometimes, it is completely no fault of your own. If that is true, you are better off without that person. However, this is often not true. Take a deep look at yourself and your relationship. If you now can see how you contributed to this break-up, you need to acknowledge that to both yourself and your significant other. Be willing to change and address the problems - even if it means getting professional help. This is often the first step in saving your relationship. However, even if it is too late for that, you need to do this for yourself, your family and your future relationships. Patterns tend to repeat themselves and, if you don't want to suffer a broken heart over and over, you may need to accept that you need to change.

4. Depression or loneliness. If your relationship is over no matter what you do, you will be sad. You will feel depression and loneliness. That's OK but recognize it for what it is. Indulge yourself for a while - eat your chocolate double-fudge ice cream or have a few drinks. However, if it goes on too long and you just can't seem to get past it, talk about it with friends or family. They often have good advice. If that doesn't work, get some counseling. You need to.

5. Move forward. Life does go on and things will get better. You cannot let this permanently affect you or steer you onto the wrong path. Get out there - hang out with your friends, be social, join some clubs or go out.

Remember - one person should have so much power over you and your happiness should not be so dependent on another individual. Trust me - you will eventually feel better. How much and how long it takes will be entirely up to you.

Teri Nelson is a divorce lawyer with experience in broken relationships. Check out Save Your Marriage Tips for many other practical tips on how to deal with a broken heart.

9 Relationship Red Flags - What Not to Overlook, Excuse, Or Deny

These 9 Relationship Red Flags have the potential of being overlooked, excused, or denied. All are reasons to stop, look, and listen to what is going on and carefully consider whether or not you should continue in the relationship. All have the potential of desensitizing you to their affects the longer you are in the relationship.

Emotional reactivity: Your partner creates drama and turmoil frequently by being upset, sensitive, moody, angry, and reactive over things that aren't really a big deal to you. As a result of this emotional reactivity, you find yourself walking on eggshells and afraid to be yourself.

Excesses that bother you: Anything your partner does to excess that bothers you now has the potential to bother you more later on. It is even worse if the person is defensive about the issue when you bring it up.

Lying: If you have caught your partner in lies, you can assume there will be more lies in the future, unless the issue underlying the lies is resolved.

Control: Your partner tries to control who you see, what you do, and how you live your life. At first, this may feel caring, but the underlying issues behind control are deep and lead to abuse later on.

Emotional/verbal/physical abuse: Your partner uses manipulative and demeaning tactics such as put downs, minimizing, ridicule, name calling, discounting, hostile anger, threats, withdrawal, and physical violence.

Problems in your partner's personal life: Whether it is with children, finances, business, family, friends, work, physical health, mental health, or sexual problems, these will become your problem(s), if the relationship continues.

Self-doubt: You find yourself questioning yourself and wondering if you crazy, overreacting, oversensitive, mean, or selfish, because your partner is telling you that you are the problem in the relationship.

Inability to resolve conflict: Your partner is unable to resolve conflict and unwilling to learn how to communicate better.

Hoping for change: You are already telling yourself that your partner needs to change. This means you see the red flags but are willing to convince yourself that they will go away rather than lose the relationship.

Proverbs 14:15 says that "a prudent man gives thought to his steps." These 9 Relationship Red Flags are there to protect you. If you are dating, all you have to do is to decide not to continue the relationship. If you are married, it is more complicated, but nevertheless, these areas need your attention in order for your life to get better.

Relationship Prayer: Help me give thought to my steps by paying attention to the warning signs that I see.

Relationship Challenge: Pay attention to the message that these 9 Red Flags in your relationship are giving you.

Next, if you need more practical tips and Biblical truths to help you change your relationships, get my FREE "15-Day Relationship Challenge" designed to give you back the power over your life.

Just click here: http://www.Free15dayChallenge.com

Karla Downing is an author, speaker, licensed marriage and family therapist, and Bible study teacher. Karla's passion is to help people find freedom in Christ in the midst of their difficult relationships and circumstances through Biblical truths and practical tools.

The Importance of Marriage Counseling in Saving Marital Relationships

Nowadays, the prevalence of couples that are going through marital problems is increasing in numbers. To a Christian community, separation and divorce are not the solution to marital problems. Every relationship undergoes rough patch. Almost every one of us experience problems that are brought by indifference, money or financial problems, jealousy, third party and other marital problems. Those people who would like to save their relationship undergo marriage counseling from a Utah marriage counselor or anywhere else they are in the world.

Marital problems are not only brought by problems such as financial instability and third-party relationships. It may even root from the use of drugs by one of the member of the family resulting to depression, anxiety and other mental disorder. If this will be the reason why there are problems in the family, the person involved must undergo treatments and counseling from Utah family therapist, Utah therapy, Utah mental health or any other institution that helps in guiding those individuals to become a better person.

Some marriage counselor's advice couples to have time dating in order to know one another much better. The couples must be given the chance to know more and discover what the couple likes to happen in their relationship. Dating can be an excellent healing process because it allows both parties to remember the times when they first met and the sweetness as well as the love that was developed between them. It can also bring fun to their lives. Marriage counseling often includes dating as a part of repairing broken marriages.

Since almost all couples argue, arguments are normal. In a relationship, someone is always right, and someone is always wrong regarding any argument. The only difference matters on the acceptance of whoever is right and who made the mistake must learn to swallow their pride and be humble in accepting that they are indeed wrong. Although it is so hard to admit that we are wrong, at times, it is extremely beneficial for a person to admit their wrong deeds in order to save the marriage. You and your partner must handle any issue professionally and not by throwing plates or things that are in the house.

Some married couples who have hard times in fixing their relationship seek guidance and professional help from a marriage counselor. Utah marriage counselors or any other counselors for married couples today can teach couples on how to manage their fears, emotions and anger, insecurity and many more. One of the most common reasons for marital problem is infidelity. How many families today are broken because of this issue? If only those who experienced infidelity of their husbands or wives are brave enough to say that they are a victim of infidelity, then we can give a definite answer to that question. Most people prefer to keep silent in order to save their families from shame and rumor or gossip.

Why is marriage counseling so effective in resolving marital conflicts? This is because marriage counselors listen carefully to both sides. Marriage counselors actively listen that is why clients would feel at ease to open up and talk more regarding the things that are bothering them. If only both partners know how to give and take and listen carefully, then there are no broken marriages or broken relationships. Listening is the basic principle in counseling.

In summary, the reason why marriage counseling can save marriage is because of the ability of most marriage counselor to listen carefully with any concern that the couple has. Marriage counselors will listen to whatever things that their client may say and then they provide feedback that will help resolve the issue or give solutions to the problem. Always remember in times that a marital problem gets into worst; seek professional help from any marriage counselor in the community that have proven effective results in saving a married couple.

Sherwin Ree E. Miras has been in the field of handling Utah family therapist for a long time and maintains a Utah marriage counselor company where you can get answers to the rest of your questions.

Single Parent Advice on Effects of Single Parenting

You are the one that is solely responsible for everything your child may need. You might have been getting help from your ex husband or wife in case he or she is in the picture even after getting divorced in the form of joint custody, shared custody, or financial support. However, even with help from an ex spouse, it is important to understand the possible effects of single parenting on your child.

These results are only statistics, so it is likely that your kid will not run into these effects of single parenting. Understanding about what you are really dealing with is the top priority

Psychological Considerations

Your child's mental health is important in regards to the effects of single parenting. Divorce can cause feelings of self blame in children, as they may wonder whether or not they were the cause. For a child, this can be devastating. Not knowing your mother or father and only having one parent in your household as a child can be equally disrupting to normal life. With no contact from the other parent the child may be inclined to wonder about certain things such as if they are still living or their reasoning for leaving them. Your child may still feel abandoned, despite your reassurance that they are not. Searching for an absent parent is likely for a single parent child and may usually lead to them wanting to have a relationship with the absent parent. Regardless of the feelings your child displays, ensure that you are aware of them, remain close and attempt to understand those feelings, and when needed that a psychologist is involved to assist in dealing with the feelings.

Educational Facets

Education is vital. Children who go through any trauma tend to see a sink in grades in the immediate future, however. If one of his or her parents moves out and the household is suddenly a single parent one, the child may feel dejected. The lost feeling your child is suffering may also affect their grades. Its always gonna be a worse effect when single parenting happens suddenly Although teachers may cut some slack to the child that is going through a tough time, you should communicate to the teacher that this is not what you want. A snowball effect will inevitably follow. Just a few weeks away from school can set your child back for the whole year and this can have repercussions for the rest of his school years. You should communicate with teachers in order to know how your child is performing in school and to ensure that they do not fall through the cracks.

Claim your free book on parenting and find out more about getting financial help by visiting single parent grants

A Good Example Of A Story Of Love and Relationship That Lasts

The fact of continually hearing so many stories of love and relationships, including the breakdowns make us wonder if love really exists anymore. The different kind of stories including love that leads to harm, love that leads to death, and love that can lead to hope, tell us much about the different types of love available.

When we think of the story of Bonnie and Clyde, we often wonder what bonded these two humans together. The couple remained faithful up until their death in a good relationship and with faithful love between them. Yet, their love was obviously misplaced. The love constructed on desire lead to death since the two joined in criminal activities that caused harm and death at the end of the relationship. The story of Bonnie and Clyde is a surefire example of compatibility, yet it illustrates the difference between unconditional love and superficial love.

Both Bonnie and Clyde came from the same origins, this is, poverty stricken homes. Both of them were tired of bad relationships and teamed up to commit acts of violence at the same time that acts of crime. During their involvement as a couple, the two partners remained faithful and loyal to each other, and often illustrated the true meaning of love, since it took death to separate the two. While the two had the human mechanism needed to originate love, the two also had harmful intentions of the type of relationship they would join.

While Bonnie and Clyde relationships are a thing of the past, there are couples today that join in relationships with good intentions, but harmful habits and this often leads to anticipated disaster.

There are many examples of harmful relationships in case studies around the world, captured in papers, media, etc. An example of a harmful relationship can be appreciated in the following story. It started out with the seemingly perfect relationship, which grew to the seemingly perfect family. The traditional family composed of father, mother, and children. The father worked daily in a mental health clinic, while the mother worked both at home and outside home. The father was later murdered by his wife and made the public wonder how such a seemingly perfect family arrangement turned so bad.

It turned out that the father while appearing loving in public, was manifesting violence and abusive behaviors at home while always keeping a low profile. Under this conditions the mother got tired and fed up with the situation, she addressed the issue in a desperate manner, which turned into the extreme physical act of murder.

As you can see, human mechanisms and elements that compose love were lacking in this family, since obviously the man had no respect for his family, or members.

Unfortunately, not every book has a cover that shows the reality of the story inside. Equally, there are persons that do not always present their real face to the person that will be his mate in a relationship. A person can live years with another individual and never detect flaws that could lead to harm, until the dark day arrives and ugly things happen. Others leave trails that indicate potential harm, but the partner being so much in love, and with lots of expectations fails to see the traits and evidence that is put in front of his eyes throughout the relationship.

Is your marriage in problems? Has your relationship become an empty one? If you want to improve the relation with the person you love and need advice, I?m sure you can find something very useful here:

http://relationship-books-advice.blogspot.com/

Improve Your Relationship Through the Timeless Wisdom of Vedic Compatibility Astrology

Relationships are one of the most important areas of life. The interplay between masculine and feminine energy is internal as well as external. The external relationship with our partner mirrors the internal relationship we have with these forces within ourself. Vedic relationship astrology is a remarkable system of scientific measurements, commonsense and holistic wisdom. Improving our external relationship, we improve our internal awareness and vice versa. Vedic astrology is deeply connected to the other Vedic sciences of yoga, ayurveda.

Both Western astrology and Vedic astrology uses the same planets, signs and houses. Yet, there are a few major differences between Western and Vedic astrology which reveal why Vedic Relationship astrology is so amazingly accurate.

Whereas Western astrology places importance on the Sun, Vedic astrology places more importance on the Moon. Vedic astrology uses 27 distant stars (called "Nakshatras") in the horoscope.

The Sun refers to our individual nature, not our desire to partner. Thus relationship compatibility must revolve around the moon, the planet of nurturing, vulnerability and receptivity. Vedic relationship astrology focuses mainly on the moons of the couple. Assessing the moons will reveal the flow of emotional energy and the quality of love flowing in the partnership. The moon is the planet of trust and comfort. It is related to our childhood, that time in life we are we were vulnerable. Based on this vulnerability we developed strengths, insecurities and complexes based on receiving things that felt good or bad. Throughout our life these strengths and weaknesses become modified, gently filtering our perceptions and attracting the experiences we feel ready to and worthy of receiving. We carry this fragile emotional psychology into our relationships. This is why when a person has a difficult childhood, they will repeat those difficulties in their relationships. It is because the Moon is what we are comfortable with, what is familiar to us. If turmoil is comfortable to us, that is what we seek in relationships. Astrologically, these emotional habits are shown by the Moon.

Vedic astrology uses 27 lunar signs as mentioned above. These 27 signs focus the subtle, refined emotional nature of each person with much more precision than 12 Western Sun signs. Yet within this increased precision there is even more refinement.

The "Ashta Kuta" (eight points) system classifies and compares each of these 27 archetypes based on more than ten criteria: (There are the 8 point giving Kutas and several other important comparisons)

* Friendliness with the other person's Moon ruler

* Temperament

* Sexual compatibility

* Vocation and caste

* Element and style (fiery, watery or airy)

* Capacity for receptivity and forgiveness

* Capacity to manifest externally as a couple, etc.

All of these criteria are actually applied to every planet in the chart adding a 10 fold strength just to the surface of Vedic Astrological compatibility. Through this subtlety it is possible to examine each planet.

In relationships the Planets show:

Sun - Our independence in the relationship

Moon - Our capacity to feel open and comfortable with the other person

Mars - Our strong ideas of how things should or shouldn't be in the relationship

Mercury - Our capacity to communicate and be flexible

Jupiter - Our common philosophies and principles, like values and religion

Venus - Our desire to experience pleasure with the partner and how we behave once the partner stops fulfilling us.

Saturn - Our need to feel safe, have proper boundaries and put in the necessary effort with the partner.

This amazing refined system shows all of the subtleties in human interaction, not just romantic relationships. It reveals why, perhaps you and your boyfriend have a good sex life, but cannot manifest anything outside of the bedroom. (High Gana Kuta, low Bhava Kuta). Or perhaps you share many interests in common but there is no spark, (High Graha Maitram, Low Yoni Kuta). Or perhaps you get along fine, but as soon as there is problem it is as if a whirlpool sucks you down into a maelstrom of confusion. (High Ashta Kuta points with Vedha or Rajju blemish)

To review:

* Vedic relationship astrology emphasizes the Moon, not the Sun

* Vedic relationship astrology uses 27 stars (Nakshatras) to delineate the planets with much more precision than twelve Sun Signs

* Vedic relationship astrology assess the 27 Star signs based on a ten-fold criteria to glean the subtle implications from each station in life.

This incredible level of accuracy is why they started arranging marriages thousands of years ago. It was not to oppress, it was to liberate and to help. It is no different than a nutritionist telling you what food is best for you or a counselor telling you which type of activities to avoid for increased peace and mental health. Once we learn to trust the universe again and restore the dignity to astrology, these truths will seem any more oppressive than a trusted doctor giving advice. Once rightly understood, Astrology is revealed to be an amazing tool for harmonizing our personal energy with the presiding universal wisdom that is all benevolent and leading us to the truth of who we really are.

Sam Geppi (Sadasiva) is a certified Vedic astrologer and author of "The Ascendant". He offers a free email course "Stellar Relationships" at Love Astrology which elucidates Vedic relationship astrology. He also offers a Free Daily Horoscope Podcast

Relationship Problems? Discover the Best Doctor Translating Your Own Dreams

You don't know how to approach him or her, everything is difficult, you are too insecure and afraid, always fearing that a thousand things could go wrong...

He or she is difficult, too handsome or beautiful, too desired by many others... Or, too silent, too distant, too indifferent...

What can you do?

Or are your problems with your friends, relatives, your boss, your neighbors, who knows...? With many other people, and not only with the person you love?

Perhaps you don't love anyone and you simply don't feel well accepted anywhere.

There are many different problems you can have concerning relationships...

Don't worry though, because you have a natural doctor who can immediately help you solve all your problems while you develop your personality and intelligence. You can discover him if you learn the dream language.

Carl Jung discovered the correct method of dream interpretation and I continued his research simplifying the complicated method he discovered at the end of the last century. Of course, since he was a beginner, his method could only be difficult...

Today you are lucky because you can easily learn everything that Jung discovered and many things more in less time than ever, and easily be able to translate your own dreams, having this way access to the wisdom of the unconscious mind.

This is the important point: the lessons you have thanks to the free and wise guidance of the unconscious mind. The best existent doctor is inside you, and you can learn his advice if you learn his language.

You can learn first of all the basic dreams about the person you love. These dreams are the simplest ones, exactly because they are the most important ones for your psychical balance. If you pass through a tragic fate in love, you'll lose your mental health...

This is why the unconscious mind sends you many protective dreams in the clearest form, giving you objective information about the person you love, and this is why you can learn how to interpret these dreams without learning how to translate all kinds of dreams. The dreams about the person you love belong to a different category, much simpler.

I advise you to study the dream language completely though, because you'll have very many advantages with this knowledge!

Dream translation is very simple now that I have discovered the meaning of so many dream symbols and their deeper meaning, which was ignored by Jung, who stopped his research at certain point.

You simply translate images to words, and then you can absorb the wisdom of the unconscious mind, giving you precious guidance about the most crucial points of your life.

You'll never have relationship problems again!

Start learning everything you can about the person you love, since this is probably the most important relationship of your life. Then you can continue learning about many things more, with the enthusiasm of a person who already found proof.

After verifying how helpful the unconscious advice is, you'll desire to learn very well the meaning of all your dreams, of course!

This knowledge is so helpful that in the future it will be taught in schools and it will be part of everyone's life.

If you are smart, take advantage of the opportunity to learn so much without delay and be successful in all your relationships with this knowledge.

When the entire world discovers the power of the unconscious, you'll have already received its benefits.

Prevent Depression and Craziness through the scientific method of Dream Interpretation discovered by Carl Jung and simplified by Christina Sponias, a writer who continued Jung's research in the unknown region of the human psychic sphere.
Learn more at: http://www.scientificdreaminterpretation.com

Click here and download your copy of the Free ebook
Beating Depression and Craziness

How to Be Aware That You're in a Codependent Relationship and What You Can Do About It

You know that your spouse has a problem and needs your help and support. And you have always prided yourself on being there for him. But now you have come to realize that maybe this isn't a good thing. Maybe you have become dependent on his need of you?

Codependence just used to refer to those linked to alcoholism or drug abuse sufferers. However, today's psychologists have a broader definition. "It really is about unhealthy emotional people can be obsessed with the pain and suffering of the other person dependencies," says Carol Cannon, MA, a counselor and program director at The Bridge to Recovery in Bowling Green, Ky.

Six signs you are in a codependent relationship

So are you a codependent? How can you tell? Here are six signs that might suggest you are in a codependent relationship.

1. Do you become obsessed with fixing and rescuing needy people? Codependents are more oriented to other people's reality than their own; they want to be someone else's savior which makes them feel happier about themselves.

2. Are you easily absorbed in the pain and problems of other people?

3. Are you trying to control someone? Is someone trying to control you? Neediness is a hallmark of a codependent relationship. One person's happiness depends on having the other person right there - right now. Not letting you hang out with friends, calling frequently to check up on you, having to be with you all the time - these are controlling behaviors

4. Do you do more than your share -- all of the time? Many codependent people were the favorite child because they did more - took care of the sick parent, got straight A's, cleaned the house. However, as an adult, when this behavior is carried on it can result in that person feeling like a martyr, victimized by doing it all.

5. Are you always seeking approval and recognition? Low-self esteem is a mark of codependence. A codependent person judges themselves harshly; they have difficulty asking others to meet their needs and they don't believe they are worthwhile or lovable.

6. Would you do anything to hold on to a relationship? Do you fear being abandoned? Many adults in codependent relationships come from families where they felt unloved, or were abandoned by either one parent or both. This makes them willing to put up with a lot in order to keep their partner with them.

Reading the signs, you think you may be in a codependent relationship, so now what? Should you leave? Get counseling? It is hard to think of yourself and your needs after focusing on your spouse's needs for so long and fitting yourself around their issues, their demands, their moods. But it is time to put yourself back in the centre, take control and think about what is good for you.

Like any problem, you need to understand what's at the root, says David A Baron, MSEd, DO, chairman of psychiatry at Temple University Health System. "Often the enabler feels guilty about the situation. They care about the other individual in the relationship; [they] know there is a good side to this person. They're hoping against hope that they can go back to the good times - even when it's blatantly obvious nothing will change." At some point, they have to realize that the situation has to change, he says. "They have to get beyond their emotions and look at the history of behavior. This has been a pattern. When you can get past the emotions and examine facts, write them down. Do a little timeline or a score card of bad behavior."

Where to turn for help? Getting professional counseling from a mental health worker, psychologist, or family physician can give you the strength to break away from a codependent relationship, Baron says. Twelve-step programs also help and are free. Group therapy also works well. You meet people who have been through what you have, who can offer advice at a grass roots level rather than approaching you as an authority figure.

Jeanne McKeon, EdD, a psychologist at the Center for Addictive Medicine at Massachusetts General Hospital in Boston, suggests short-term family therapy which can be very effective. "You don't have to get into years of analysis. You're looking at the family, how it's affecting everybody, what the game plan should be. Getting everybody together equalizes things so no one feels blamed."

There is so much information and assistance out there for those suffering from codependency; all you need is to gain the knowledge of that information and the strength to ask for help. And of course, the more you understand codependency and how it affects you, and your relationships with your family and friends, the more you can cope with its effects.

Nancy Travers, a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, specializes in all types of relationships; dating, existing relationships, family relationships, and relationships with friends and business relationships. She also helps her clients overcome anxiety and depression through talk therapy as well as through hypnosis. What sets her apart from many other counselors is that she has counseled in the gay/lesbian community for over 10 years. She also has experience counseling families with elder care issues. Nancy has been in practice for over 15 years and can provide you with the tools you need to approach dating and relationships with confidence. Visit her website at http://www.nancyscounselingcorner.com.

Happy Relationship Tips - Active Listening

An unsung hero in communication techniques is deep and active listening. One of the ways we want to set people up to win, is to give them a platform from which they can get real!When we give people the space to speak openly, all kinds of wonderful things happen, including connection, elimination of friction, and optimum mental health!

Deep and active listening means that we are not waiting for our turn to talk but are hearing every word that is spoken.

When we do this, we allow the other person to speak and finish speaking before responding. While listening to that person speak, we really listen rather than formulate a response to what they are saying. If needed, we can take notes and refer back to them when it's time to respond.

Other key ingredients to Active Listening are:

Knowing that a response isn't always necessary.
Abstaining from "fixing" the person who is speaking.
Giving the speaker the dignity of their own experience.
Listening without judging.
Not making it about you. Whatever your speaker is saying, you may hold the space and allow them to be who they are in this moment. It is not a reflection of yourself.
Abstaining from evaluating it or judging. You can evaluate my own experience and provide space for you to share your experience with me if you desire to do so.

Your Assignment:

The VERY next conversation that you have, try to apply three of the above principles of Active Listening. Each subsequent conversation, add another principle to your repertoire. With some folks it will be easier than others. You will be a champion when you can apply all of the principles to someone who pushes your buttons. Let me know how it goes!

Sarah Anma helps people in loving committed relationships upgrade their relationship, skyrocket their connection, and communicate easily and effectively. Get a Free Audio CD 'How to Attract and Grow the Love of Your Life' by signing up here

Advice on Love to Save Your Relationship Today

Modern society has become more stressful and its people are becoming so busy they can hardly take time off for themselves. This may result in negligence towards your loved one and you may need some advice on love to save your relationship because there are things in a relationship many couples overlook.

With the amount of work a modern society worker needs to do every day, and the undue demand from the government to set up individual private businesses while being able to serve the country as if they were full time soldiers, your body and mind would have been drastically drained. Spare time that should have been spent on your partner would be spent on getting those precious few moments of rest. Do remember that while rest is important, your loved one is important as well and moments spent with them are precious too. With the rare moments you have to spend with your partner, why not spend them wisely and fruitfully?

Have fun being together. Find time for you and your partner to do things together, like going for a couple's spa or going for an evening's joy ride in the car. Back when you two were dating, you would make time to meet each other and go on dates where no one except the envious public would disturb you. Look back and remember the times when you two enjoyed the times at the theatre and savoured romantic moments at the restaurants. Continue being with each other and do things that you two would enjoy.

Learn to communicate better. Talk to each other about things that really matter, such as whether they have been feeling the strain in their lives, or what they want to do in life. Simply asking every day, "How was your day?" would become something mundane or just mandatory and its effect would be weakened. Figure what is on your partner's mind and help to ease any mental burdens your partner may be having. In return, your partner could become your listening ear for you to release any pent up emotions you may have about work, family or just about everything.

Love each other again. Find the spark that ignited the romance between you and your loved one and try to create it again. With all the hustle and bustle of modern life, your attention would have been diverted to your work, your family or the government and that intimate feeling you and your partner shared gets buried beneath the mountainous pile of stress. With what little time you can save during the weekends or during the holidays, spend time with your lover and restore the intimacy the two of you might have lost, regardless whether it was as simple as dining as your favourite restaurants or requiring a bit more spending money to go crazy at the mall.

Stress can become dangerous to a person's life and when not properly controlled, more than just your relationship could be affected. Health advisors often say that you need to find ways to relieve excessive stress. Why not look to your loved one in order to find love, trust and confidence again, all while washing away the stresses of life?

Saving a relationship can be as easy as ABC but you must know what to do and what to say to get your ex lover back in your arms. Check out our relationship site as we have a recommended list of best relationship books to take you by the hand when you are feeling lost in your relationship journey.

Understanding and Freeing Yourself From Abusive Relationships

You don't really know what you've got in a relationship until you've been with someone for a long time and by then, you've already got used to that wonderful, charming human being that you'd fallen in love with and then things start to go horribly wrong.

If someone is not treating you the way you deserve to be treated, then it's time to stand up for yourself, which often means having to make the decision to let go and set yourself free to be with someone who will offer you the love and respect you deserve. We are all wonderful, unique human beings and deserve nothing less.

It's hard to withdraw when you've already spent a lot of good times with them, fallen for their charms, love and adore them so much; remembering how good things can be and clinging to the hope that things will get better. You're already strongly, emotionally attached to them, yet they have begun to abuse you mentally, emotionally, verbally, physically and financially. You don't want things to end but at the same time they're making you feel worthless, destroying your self confidence and affecting your health.

They have enslaved you, to some extent, attempting to have total control over every aspect of your life. They have alienated you from friends and family in an attempt to restrict your contact with them, but at the same time will feed them with lies about what a horrible, nasty person you are.

You are aware that they're doing this, but still, you're hopeful that you can fix them; that their behavior will stop and you're not giving up on the dream. Meantime, you're losing the respect of everyone around you because you're refusing to free yourself from this situation.

You are left with him/her and it's YOU who needs therapy. That's their ultimate goal.

Sound familiar?

Why do we meet these people? I firmly believe that we meet everyone in this life for a reason and that the most difficult people we meet are our greatest teachers.

If you find yourself in such a relationship, then you definitely have some self esteem issues to work through. Otherwise, why else would you waste time with someone who would belittle you and make you feel unworthy, when there are so many wonderful people out there ready to complement your life - mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually?

I've had to stand by and watch friends be treated very badly by an abuser and sympathize with them, but, there's nothing I can do for them or that we can do for ourselves, until we decide that we've had enough and it's time to help ourselves.

No-one can help you, but you. And only you, in your own good time, can get to the root of the problem and decide that enough is enough.

Take a look at your past and particularly, your childhood. There was someone then that treated you badly in some way, making you feel unworthy. This person has been put in front of you now to re-awaken those feelings and for you to work through them. You don't deserve to be treated like that or made to feel like that by anyone in this life and, until you realize this and stand up for yourself, then you will continue to go in an out of abusive relationships.

If you refuse to pinpoint and deal with those issues now, then you will continue in your relationship, with things becoming progressively worse. Maybe not - maybe something extreme will happen e.g. they end up beating you severely or walking off with their next victim. In either case, you're left on your own again until the next abusive partner comes along. And so the cycle continues.

Many people just go from one abusive relationship to another, without ever fixing the issues that are leading them into those relationships. It is not until we love, respect and stand up for ourselves, that we end this cycle and allow other, loving and respectful human beings to enter our lives.

What about the abuser? What's their problem?

Again, this person has issues, which are deeply rooted in their childhood. They have obviously witnessed and/or experienced some form of abuse in order for them to have picked up this behavior. However, the abusers can be split into two categories:

The first category is your typical 'run of the mill' abusive relationship. There's a cycle, where there's the abuse, then the apologies, then swearing their undying love to their partner, full of promises that they will change and that they will never do it again. And so, the abused partner, more often than not, goes back for more.

That, to a degree, I can understand because the abused partner is always hopeful that they actually will change. I myself believe that everyone on this earth is inherently good and capable of change, but, at the same time, how many apologies are you going to accept?

Unless your partner is showing definite signs of change i.e. progressing therapy, taking accountability and changes in their behavior, then how long are you willing to put up with their behavior before you decide that you are worth so much more?

The second category is the sociopath. Like your 'normal' abuser, they can be so charming externally, but, once you've noticed that your other half is displaying sociopath tendencies, it's time to withdraw as soon as you possibly can. You can't fix them and you can't make them happy. It's impossible! They don't want happiness and when they find it, they will do all they can to systematically destroy it. They are not 'happy' unless they're miserable.

The difference between the two is very easy to spot because, unlike your 'normal' abuser, who will apologize, try to make amends and can show signs of improvement, the sociopath will show nothing but contempt for those who try to understand and help them. They have no conscience, no guilt and therefore absolutely nothing to apologize for. They can sit and look at pictures of the abuse and swear blind that they didn't do that. Alternatively, they will admit to their behavior, but they fail to recognize it as abusive - it was your fault and you deserved to be treated like that. They will tell you that you are the one with the problem and making big issues out of nothing.

There are other tell-tale signs:

They are incapable of commitment. They may have had some long-term relationships, but these are always tumultuous. They often have several short-term marriages behind them, which have quickly ended in divorce because their sociopath tendencies often accelerate after they have married and have someone they feel they can control, but can't.

The sociopath can also be very promiscuous, since they have no remorse and no personal boundaries. Therefore, it's highly likely that they will have several 'lifeboats' floating around so, once you've stood strong and let them know that you will not put up with their behavior, they will already have found their next, vulnerable victim, long before you've slammed the door shut (although they've probably got your head slammed in the door as it's closing!).

Sociopaths are found among those who have killed animals and people without remorse (your typical serial killer); however, it may not always be that extreme.

This person will set out to destroy you - physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually and financially - if you let them. Believe me, you can't win this one, so, if you have someone who is abusing you and then denying all knowledge or failing to admit that their behavior is abusive, then it's better to admit defeat, cut your losses and run!

Apparently, it's a mental condition that can also be cured since therapists believe that the condition is caused by a traumatic childhood experience such as abuse or abandonment by a parent. However, in order for that person to be cured, they need to admit that they need help and to undergo extensive, cognitive therapy until they've got to the root of the problem.

Since the sociopath is such a skilled manipulator and liar (some have even been known to pass lie detector tests when it is pathological lying) and, because they don't need help, then it's highly unlikely that they will ever seek help and if they do, they will be able to convince a therapist that they are now fine and no longer require their services.

Problems with the mind are the same as physical problems - everything can be fixed. But, in order for this to happen, your partner has to be willing to undergo therapy and in the case of the sociopath, their only chance of any kind of progress, is if you can first of all get them to admit that their behavior is abusive.

If you're reading this and currently experiencing any type of abusive relationship, then please stand strong. We are all unique and wonderful human beings put on this earth to enjoy life, to love and help one another; to live each day like it's our very last and to be happy. No-one deserves to be treated badly. Every one of us deserves love and respect and should settle for nothing else.

Please recognize the issue in yourself that has attracted this character to you, work through this and then take steps to improve your situation. If your partner can't take accountability and take steps to change, then you have to free yourself as soon as possible.

You may be left in a situation (as is often the case) where he/she has taken all of your finances and you're scared to leave. Believe me, if you can close that door, stand up for yourself as a human being and have faith, then there are agencies out there that can help you. God/the Universe will open doors and provide for you. You and your children especially (if you have any), deserve to have a very happy, peaceful, normal life. They deserve nothing less to give them a good start in life.

Remember, it's not the person you will be missing, but the dream of the life that you thought you would be having together.

It was just that, unfortunately, a dream. Remember, that he/she will never change until they decide that they need help and that they will continue to treat people as they treat you. Whoever they have chosen next is being/will be treated as badly as you were (if not worse) because, without help, their behavior will have accelerated.

But, that dream can easily come true for you when you allow yourself to let go and set yourself free to find someone who will truly love and respect you, and who would never hurt you - in any way.

There's one more, very important, thing to remember though, when you do decide to break free - you look yourself in the mirror and tell yourself:

"I am a wonderful, beautiful person. I deserve nothing but the best in this life and will never allow anyone to treat me like that again".

We don't want to be falling into the same trap next time around now, do we?

If you're reading this and in an abusive relationship of any kind, then please seek help at: National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 or 1-800-787-3224 (TDD). The hotline has information about shelters, mental heath care, legal advice and other types of assistance.

Relationship Breakup Advice - An Easy Tip To Cope And Be Happy Again

Are you looking for relationship breakup advice because your relationship is in trouble? If so, you've come to the right place. Pull up a chair as I will show you some proven techniques to get through your breakup and come out stronger than ever before. A breakup is a tough and difficult time and can take a toll on our mental, physical, and emotional health. It can negatively impact all other areas of your life and create a downward spiral unless you take control and get your situation handled. Breakups also have a tendency to cloud our judgments so we make poor decisions. It's important to have the ability to take a step back and take a birds eye look at our situation so we can act in the best manner. As difficult of a time as it is, there is relationship breakup advice that will help see you through.

Relationship breakup advice tip 1: take inventory of the situation. This means analyze your situation and relationship in an unbiased manner. Involve a friend if you have to. You want to analyze what went well and what was bad in the relationship and what ultimately led to its current state. By knowing what caused the deterioration, you will then be prepared to tackle the issue head on and decide where you want to go from there. The best relationship breakup advice is to know yourself and know what happened so you can make things better. This break up advice works because you'll know how to proceed once you get the full picture.

Relationship breakup advice tip 2: the next step once you have an accurate assessment of what went right and what went wrong is to decide what you want. Do you want to move on? Do you want to get back together? Do you only want to get back because you miss the companionship or do you genuinely love your ex and want to make things work out again? These are all questions you have to ask yourself. It's important to know that you can define your own reality. You can make anything happen, but the first step is knowing what you want.

If you want to get back with your ex fast, then check out [http://dealingwithabreakup.info] some relationship breakup advice [http://dealingwithabreakup.info] here. I decided I wanted to get back with my ex and I didn't know it was so easy to do. It wasn't long before my ex came running back to me and things worked out again even better than before.

A Link Between the Mediterranean Diet and Mental Acuity in Seniors

There are a lot of things that people have traditionally advised to do to alleviate, or, in some cases, prevent the onset, and/or severity of various conditions and symptoms associated with aging. One area of particular concern with seniors and those contemplating making their senior years more enjoyable, healthful, and productive is that of mental acuity.

They are particularly concerned with the subject of the mental decline commonly associated with increasing age. Of special interest is how to prevent, or at least delay, mental confusion, dementia, and Alzheimer's disease. They tend to open themselves up to bits of anti-aging advice relevant to this topic, often more intensely than those related to health in general.

Some of these bits of advice focus on exercise, some on the maintenance of relationships and activities which keep the brain active, and some focus on nutrition.

One such recent, nutritionally related, item is the conclusion of a research study done by Rush University Medical Center in Chicago.

Specifically interested in the Mediterranean Diet, which has shown great promise in the area of physical health, researchers wanted to determine if slower brain aging might also be added to the diet's list of potential health benefits,

The Mediterranean Diet, typically associated with the consumption of a lot of wine, fruits, vegetables, legumes, olive oil and fish, buy very little red meat has appeared to be effective in improving, or at least maintaining many physical aspects of health. This particular type of nutritional intake has been linked to improvement in levels and events of heart disease, cancer and diabetes, as well as other health issues.

The researchers in the Chicago study specifically wanted to see if the typical decrease in mental ability experienced by seniors might be slowed, or even stopped, by eating such a diet.

Initial data obtained from the Chicago tests appears to indicate that, in general, eating a diet based on the Mediterranean style of eating, as opposed to the standard U.S. dietary guidelines, does indeed apparently slow the decrease in brain function. As pointed out at one point, an individual eating the Mediterranean diet, all other things being equal, could actually function as if they were a few years younger.

The researchers sought to factor out other lifestyle issues and such items as education in order to zero in on the effects of the nutritional choices themselves. However, it is the combination of such items, together with those nutritional choices and even genetic inheritance, which will eventually determine how slowly, or rapidly, old age takes over the reins and exerts control over our lives.

With this in mind, as always, I recommend regular activity, maintenance of personal relationships, lots of good sleep, and fun, in addition to a well-balanced diet, Mediterranean or otherwise, to help delay the arrival of the symptoms of aging and to ease their effects once they have made their appearance.

One piece of good news, by the way, at least for some of us, is that the consumption of red wine, a staple component of the Mediterranean diet, may be a major contributing factor to the benefits associated with consumption of the other ingredients. Red wine is rich in antioxidants and contains resveratrol which appears to have anti-aging properties of its own.

Donovan Baldwin is a 65-year-old amateur bodybuilder, freelance writer, certified optician, and Internet marketer currently living in the Dallas, Texas area. A University Of West Florida alumnus (1973) with a BA in accounting, he has been a member of Mensa and has been a Program Accountant for the Florida State Department of Education, the Business Manager of a community mental health center, and a multi-county Fiscal Consultant for an educational field office. He has also been a trainer for a major international corporation, and has managed various small businesses, including his own. After retiring from the U. S. Army in 1995, with 21 years of service, he became interested in Internet marketing and developed various online businesses. He has been writing poetry, articles, and essays for over 40 years, and now frequently publishes original articles on his own websites and for use by other webmasters. His blog, Fitness After 40, may be followed at http://fitness-after-40.blogspot.com.

Can You Be Single Yet Happy? Dating Tips & Advice

Do these words "Single and happy" sound like a bit of a paradox to you? Are you of the opinion that singles can not be happy? Are you postponing decisions in life only with the by-line, after I am married and settled?

Do you often feel that fun and enjoyment in life can not be fully appreciated unless you have someone to share it with? And do you always think that there is never enough time and monetary resources for a single person, to pursue any experience which bring true happiness ?

If these are your inner gut feel, not to lose hope. Go through the following tips to appreciate your present status in a different perspective. It is possible, through a lot of behavioral changes. The tips highlight how to lead a carefree, fun-filled and balanced existence as a single person, which in turn also paves the path for you to achieve a nice, healthy long-term relationship in future.

1. Seek self-fulfillment as an individual.

Concentrate on yourself first. Focus on the things that bring you joy and fulfillment. Be it a hobby or people, do whatever makes you happy. Don't let peace and enjoyment elude you as you wait eternally to share a good movie or a beautiful scenery with your future partner.

2. Don't put off important life decisions while waiting for that special someone.

Take life as it comes. Take appropriate decisions when the time is relevant according to you. For instance owning a house. Go ahead and do it. Hardly matters if it is too small in future. You can take a further decision to sell or rent that house. But right now it suffices your immediate needs and helps you invest in something which brings safety and security.

Also comes with tax benefits. If you decide to change cities, change jobs, go back to studies - do it by all means. Just might need a bit of re-shuffling your priorities but delaying such decisions can permanently switch off a plan, if you wait for a partner to arrive and settle down first. Time waits for none. Don't put your life on hold for anyone, that also yet unseen and unmet. Instead, work towards achieving your goals with determination and a sense of purpose.

3. Pamper yourself

Do some indulgence every now and then. It keeps you happy and alive. Like taking a holiday to an exotic island which you always wanted. Of course, you can repeat the exercise with the special someone later.

Do things which a couple would do normally. Live in style, for your self. Use good looking china at the dinner table, light that romantic candle and put on your favorite song while you munch alone. You deserve these small but important things to yourself.

Make your home beautiful. You will feel like returning to it everyday. You can easily do this without having to spend a fortune. Make it as cozy as possible - a dream retreat. You and your mate can re-decorate it once you establish a life together.

4. Make a plan, not excuses

Plan and organize your life. Don't give so much importance and priority to your job that it seems you are married to it. Set time schedules for each activity and work according to priority. We often hold our job as the most popular excuse for us not being able to do anything else in life - things which befit our other needs and desires.

You think ignoring your job means not going up the corporate ladder or slowing down. But remember the most important thing is to bring a sense of balance in life. Because lack of it affects your mental, emotional, spiritual and leisure of life. A workaholic is someone you may meet, but never be one.

5. Write down your must haves.

Stop that mad rush all the time. Learn to relax and take it easy and unwind. It helps with your mental health. Keep a score card how you're doing and make necessary adjustments. Stop being a couch potato, delete TV from your life once in a while. Instead, read a good stimulating book, reflect and look inwards to get peace and tranquility.

You have just started to turn a new leaf in life. Let this spring bring a long-lasting spring to your life. After all, this earth is our earth - this time is our time. Make full use of what you have already and see all the beautiful things Mother Nature has to offer in bountiful. And lastly, don't let the spirit of life dampen, for this is the only permanent thing we have with us. Irrespective of our relationshipstatus.

Joshua Goh is dating & relationship expert. His desire is to motivate and support single men, women and couples to overcome the obstacles preventing them from attaining the loving relationships and lives they really want. For more information please visit our site for up-to-date free personals reviews and practical online dating tips & ideas.