The Importance of Marriage Counseling in Saving Marital Relationships

Nowadays, the prevalence of couples that are going through marital problems is increasing in numbers. To a Christian community, separation and divorce are not the solution to marital problems. Every relationship undergoes rough patch. Almost every one of us experience problems that are brought by indifference, money or financial problems, jealousy, third party and other marital problems. Those people who would like to save their relationship undergo marriage counseling from a Utah marriage counselor or anywhere else they are in the world.

Marital problems are not only brought by problems such as financial instability and third-party relationships. It may even root from the use of drugs by one of the member of the family resulting to depression, anxiety and other mental disorder. If this will be the reason why there are problems in the family, the person involved must undergo treatments and counseling from Utah family therapist, Utah therapy, Utah mental health or any other institution that helps in guiding those individuals to become a better person.

Some marriage counselor's advice couples to have time dating in order to know one another much better. The couples must be given the chance to know more and discover what the couple likes to happen in their relationship. Dating can be an excellent healing process because it allows both parties to remember the times when they first met and the sweetness as well as the love that was developed between them. It can also bring fun to their lives. Marriage counseling often includes dating as a part of repairing broken marriages.

Since almost all couples argue, arguments are normal. In a relationship, someone is always right, and someone is always wrong regarding any argument. The only difference matters on the acceptance of whoever is right and who made the mistake must learn to swallow their pride and be humble in accepting that they are indeed wrong. Although it is so hard to admit that we are wrong, at times, it is extremely beneficial for a person to admit their wrong deeds in order to save the marriage. You and your partner must handle any issue professionally and not by throwing plates or things that are in the house.

Some married couples who have hard times in fixing their relationship seek guidance and professional help from a marriage counselor. Utah marriage counselors or any other counselors for married couples today can teach couples on how to manage their fears, emotions and anger, insecurity and many more. One of the most common reasons for marital problem is infidelity. How many families today are broken because of this issue? If only those who experienced infidelity of their husbands or wives are brave enough to say that they are a victim of infidelity, then we can give a definite answer to that question. Most people prefer to keep silent in order to save their families from shame and rumor or gossip.

Why is marriage counseling so effective in resolving marital conflicts? This is because marriage counselors listen carefully to both sides. Marriage counselors actively listen that is why clients would feel at ease to open up and talk more regarding the things that are bothering them. If only both partners know how to give and take and listen carefully, then there are no broken marriages or broken relationships. Listening is the basic principle in counseling.

In summary, the reason why marriage counseling can save marriage is because of the ability of most marriage counselor to listen carefully with any concern that the couple has. Marriage counselors will listen to whatever things that their client may say and then they provide feedback that will help resolve the issue or give solutions to the problem. Always remember in times that a marital problem gets into worst; seek professional help from any marriage counselor in the community that have proven effective results in saving a married couple.

Sherwin Ree E. Miras has been in the field of handling Utah family therapist for a long time and maintains a Utah marriage counselor company where you can get answers to the rest of your questions.

Marriage Fitness Test - A 10 Point Checkup Measuring Marital Health and Well-Being

In my years of private practice specializing in couples therapy, I have come to some central truths about elements vital to marital health and the prognosis for intimate relationships based on ten critical factors. Give yourself and your spouse a giant service by each taking this ten minute test and comparing notes.

If individually or together you average below 80% when you tally up, your marriage is limping along and needs some work! If your scores are 80% or higher, you are already doing a lot of things right, and it's probably not an accident. Now your job is to become more aware of who's doing what to nurture the marriage, so you can both commit to consciously continuing the good work!

Rate your relationship on a scale of one to ten, with ten being the highest score:

1. Do you both have an overall feeling of happiness in your relationship?

2. Do you spend quality time together on a regular basis?

3. Do you divide the chores of life (childcare, bill paying, housework, laundry, shopping, earning a living, etc.), in a way which feels fair and even-handed to you both?

4. Do you show appreciation and respect for eachother?

5. Do you feel free enough to speak openly about your wants, needs, and hurts?

6. Do you each put energy into being emotionally / sexually close?

7. Do your fights feel safe and ultimately productive?

8. Do you honor eachother's need for space (alone time, individual friendships)?

9. Do you protect eachother from other people's unacceptable or hurtful behaviors?

10. Do you keep agreements and promises?

Reflect upon, and discuss your results and scores. In areas where you have scored lower, resolve to making one significant change with an action plan in the coming weeks, as a good beginning. Retest yourselves in one month and notice any improvements, then move on to another area of weakness and do the same thing. If nothing seems to shift in a meaningful way, you may consider professional help.

Susan Lager, LICSW, is a board certified psychotherapist in private practice in Portsmouth, N.H. where at The Couples Center, she specializes in providing comprehensive services to married and unmarried partners at all stages of the coupling process. In May 2010 she launched Couplespeak, for online coaching, consultation, training programs and materials designed to assist individuals and couples strengthen and build their relationships. Look for her now on her blog about relationship issues at: http://susanlagerbeaclosercouple.blogspot.com/