Build a Stronger Marriage by Setting Relationship Goals

When you consider what your relationship needs, consider the laws of gravity. An object that is set in motion will continue to move, unless something stands in its way. On the flip side, a motionless object will never move unless something acts upon it. Your relationship or marriage will remain inert unless you act to put it and keep it in motion. And, just as day-to-day goals keep you moving from one task to the next, setting goals for your relationship will infuse your relationship with that vital momentum.

When you and your partner work together to create goals that improve or maintain the health of your relationship, you also create an atmosphere of collegiality and companionship. Relationship goals will help you and your partner remain focused whenever the relationship goes through the difficult transitions that all unions experience. These goals can also act as the antidote to the stagnation and lethargy that can creep into any marriage over time.

Establishing relationship goals does not have to be a complicated process. In fact, the simpler and more straightforward the goal, the better. The biggest challenge you'll face is remaining consistent in your efforts toward reaching your goals.

Working toward your relationship goals means working to become a better partner to your mate. A word of warning, though: Do not establish goals for your partner! Focus on establishing your own goals, your partner should focus on his/her goals, and the two of you can create joint goals (e.g., traveling more, spending more time socializing with other couples, sharing household tasks).

Relationship goals--Where to begin:

First, pick an area of your relationship that you'd like to work on. Here are some examples:

1. Communication goals: How can you become a better communicator? This might involve asking your partner more questions about his/her job, not interrupting your partner while s/he is speaking, or stating your needs more directly.

2. Compassion/support goals: This might involve asking your partner what s/he needs, driving him/her to a doctor's appointment, or setting aside a certain amount of time each day to check in with each other.

3. Affection/love goals: How often and how clearly do you express your emotions? Being affectionate can take on many different forms: directly with loving statements; through touch, such as hand-holding or a shoulder rub; or by establishing special gestures that only the two of you share. Establishing goals to be more demonstrative means finding creative ways to express loving feelings on a regular basis.

3. Negotiation/compromise goals: Being in a committed relationship means learning to compromise. Taking steps to appreciate your partner's viewpoint (even when you may not agree with him/her) sends the message that you take your partner's needs seriously. Negotiating and learning to "agree to disagree" are essential for the health of your relationship.

4. Commitment goals: You can't feel an intimate connection with another human being unless you first feel safe with him/her. When you demonstrate commitment, you lay the groundwork for emotional safety and therefore, for intimacy. Think of commitment like a safety net: even during difficult times, that commitment will be there to break your fall. Establishing commitment goals might involve spending more time with your partner or making decisions that clearly demonstrate that your relationship is a top priority in your life.

5. Physical intimacy goals: Take steps to become a more attuned, responsive sexual partner. For instance, take the time to discover all the ways in which your partner would like to be sexually satisfied or come to an agreement with your partner regarding how often you'd both like to make love.

6. Shared interests/activities goals: The most successful married couples cite friendship as a key ingredient of their long-term success. Work toward developing activities that you both enjoy and that you both enjoy sharing with one another. You might try a new activity together each month, such as taking tennis lessons or learning to speak a new language.

7. Household responsibility goals: How involved are you with completing household chores? Does it feel like the work is equally or fairly divided? The mundane details of daily life (things like cooking, shopping, cleaning) should be negotiated, not just assumed by default. Find out if your partner is happy with the current arrangement by asking if there is more that you can do.

This list is by no means exhaustive. Reflect on the areas of your relationship that you'd like to improve. Do some introspecting on your own and also think back to feedback you may have already received from your partner. For instance, if your partner has questioned your commitment by noting, "You never call when you say you're going to," you can develop a goal to show your commitment by becoming more reliable in following through on your promises.

Is your relationship worth protecting? Are you ready to make your marriage everything it can be?

Find out how to create the relationship of your dreams: Sign up for the free Relationship Toolbox Newsletter at http://StrengthenYourRelationship.com/ and immediately receive two FREE reports that will help you achieve your relationship potential.

Rich Nicastro, Ph.D. is a relationship coach who is passionate about helping couples protect the sanctuary of their relationship.

Build Your Health Practice Using Twitter

It seems the whole world is talking about Twitter, but how relevant is it to you when you want to attract new patients into your health clinic?

As with all social media, Twitter is about establishing and building relationships with people. As a health professional you have information and opinions that many people in your community would be very interested in. By starting to "tweet" short (less than 140 characters) messages with interesting content you will start to make a name for yourself and will slowly attract followers.

What do you need to do then?

First of all, join Twitter and set-up your free account. Choose a name that is simple and not too weird - I am not sure I would want to be in contact with a chiropractor called "backbreaker"....

Now try and find a few people that know you (friends and family are a good start) and who are registered with Twitter themselves. You can do this in the search function on your home page.

Now you are ready to let the world get to know you!

So what should you "tweet" about? Experts say you need to vary your content; perhaps your first tweet may be sending a link to an interesting news article that you feel your audience may be interested in. For example, if you are a masseur and a new piece of research suggests massage may be fantastic for stress relief - send the link out to your followers. Don't ask for clients, just provide the information - remember this is about relationships!

Next you might have had a fascinating conversation with a friend about a current film - go ahead and "tweet" your opinions. Or perhaps you have planned a great meal for the evening - let people know what you are planning.

By varying your message you are doing a very worthwhile thing - you are showing yourself to be human, to have a life away from your work, and people love that! Also you are providing content of interest to people - again this is great; who wouldn't like free, high quality content sent to them.

As always, this shouldn't be seen as a short-term business-boom strategy. Building relationships is about first getting people to know who you are. As the relationship grows they will come to like you and eventually to trust you enough to recommend you to friends and family.

Using social media is a great way of building trust and Twitter is no different. If you are after hard sell marketing then you are in the wrong place. Today's audience doesn't want to be sold to; they want to be valued and respected.

Use Twitter as a tool for growing relationships and soon you will be contacted by your first prospective client, who has come to trust you simply because she had followed you for a few months on Twitter. How great would that feel?

Good luck!

Andre Duquemin works with health professionals to help them fill their practices with patients. He also writes "Practice Builder", a free weekly newsletter, which you can sign-up for at http://www.attractpatientsnow.com/ As an extra gift you will also receive his free e-course "5 great tips to help build your health practice".

Build Your Health Practice Using Facebook

Starting to use Facebook for building your health practice is a really smart move. Using any social media to build relationships with prospective patients is great, and Facebook is one of the best places to start.

So what should you do?

If you don't have a Facebook "profile" already, then sign-up for one immediately at Facebook.com. It is a very simple sign-up procedure and should only take minutes to complete.

From there you have several options: you can use this profile purely for your health practice, you could use this profile for both your health practice AND your personal relationships or you could use this main profile for your personal relationships and set-up a Facebook "page" for your practice.

This final option is the smartest as you get to have a page devoted entirely to your practice and nothing else. So, for instance, if an old friend wishes to contact you through Facebook then you can connect with them through your personal "profile", leaving your "page" for your practice.

Unfortunately Facebook doesn't make it too obvious how to set-up a "page", but if you look at the bottom of the main profile page you simply need to click on "advertising", then "pages" and, finally, "create a page". Now create your page making sure you add your practice logo, details of websites etc and make it all look great.

Then it is all about building relationships! You need to encourage "fans" to join, so make sure that any friends already on Facebook become "fans" immediately. Next you must start to provide a high quality service; social media is NOT about selling to people, and is ALL about encouraging and growing relationships with the people that you serve.

You need to offer something of value to your audience, so perhaps offer a Q and A section for anyone with any problems that you regularly treat. Give advice freely and encourage people to ask questions. Write short articles of interest and post there, and do the same with any blogs that you write for your website. The great thing about this is the viral nature of social media - anything you post on your page will be seen on the profiles of all of your "fans", meaning increased visibility for your practice without spending a thing on advertising.

Good luck!

Andre Duquemin works with health professionals to help them fill their practices with patients. He also writes "Practice Builder", a free weekly newsletter, which you can sign-up for at http://www.attractpatientsnow.com/.

As an extra gift you will also receive his free e-course "5 great tips to help build your health practice."

5 Ways to Build Strong Relationships - Empower Your Partner

You cannot build a strong house with weak bricks; nor can you build a strong relationship by tearing down your partner. Relationships are opportunities to learn about ourselves by learning about others; even though they are so often used to make one person feel good at the expense of another. The key to building a strong, healthy relationship is making the component parts as strong and healthy as possible. Empower your relationship by empowering your partner. Here are five-ways you can strengthen your relationship by building-up your partner.

1. Support and Encourage Your Partner. Don't put fear and doubt between them and their dreams and aspirations; empower them with positive words and thoughts - have faith in their vision.

2. Build Your Partner up. Don't tear your partner down with negativity; and don't belittle them. Build your partner's confidence and self-esteem.

3. Praise and Compliment Your Partner. If you can't find something nice to say, you probably shouldn't burden another human with your presence. Open your eyes, open your heart, open your mind, and open your mouth and say something genuine, sincere, and nice.

4. Be Nice and Kind to Your Partner. All living things deserve kindness; yet so many people withhold this common courtesy from those dearest to them. Be nice and kind for your partner, and for yourself; the benefits to your health, life, and relationship are tremendous.

5. Love and Appreciate Your Partner. It may seem obvious, but if you're in a relationship, you should love and appreciate the person who has devoted their time to being with you. You should find things about them to appreciate; and you should learn to love unconditionally. This is a gift and an opportunity - not a requirement.

If you learn to do these five-things, you will help your partner grow and flourish; you'll help them bloom into a fuller version of their "old self." If you don't, you will simply become more and more miserable and/or withdrawn from your relationship and your life. You owe it to yourself and your partner to learn how to build and strengthen your relationship. It's easier than you might think, and the rewards are more than worth the effort.

*To download your FREE, Illustrated Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) Manual, go to: http://www.ExploreExpandEvolve.com/free_download/ (It only takes about 10-seconds to get your Free EFT manual and start erasing fears, phobias, negative self-talk, resentment, and limiting beliefs that could be limiting you and ruining or sabotaging your health, life, and relationships!)

Pete Koerner is the author of The Belief Formula: The Secret to Unlocking the Power of Prayer. The Belief Formula is a look at how you can use ancient wisdom and modern scientific awareness to learn how to use your mind to reclaim your health and create the life of your dreams.

For a Free Report on Making The Belief Formula Work for You, visit: http://www.TheBeliefFormula.com

How To Build Empowering Relationships

Firstly in order to build an empowering relationship with anyone be that person your doctor, a friend, a colleague, your boss, your lover or your Self you need to understand how not to build a relationship then through looking at that you can build empowering ones.

So what is an unhealthy relationship?

Any relationship that is built on lies is not healthy and therefore is dis-empowering to you and the other person involved. Let me explain

In an ideal world you trust the people you have formed relationships with or you feel you should. Think again, this isn't an ideal world. Sometimes this world seems very cruel. Sometimes it can feel like the whole wide world is out to get you and only you understand yourself. This way of thinking can lead to you building relationships with just about anyone, as long as you can relate to them and visa versa.

Why do you need to relate to them? Communication is a form of connection, but it's not enough. The more desperate, lonely, unhappy, isolated and disconnected you feel from life, people or society in general the more your tendency will be to connect with anybody. Rightly or wrongly these ties are generally built on lies and don't empower either you or the other and end up creating a lot of pain for the both of you.

So why build the relationships in the first place if it's all lies and no ties? To feel loved, wanted and at the very least attractive, sexy, intelligent or kind. You name it you can find an excuse to create it. People are inherently different set apart by beliefs, cultures, skin colours, capacity for learning, sexuality, location, age etc. The problem lies inside by design. So before you shout and scream don't worry about a thing. You are not to blame it's just a flaw in a humans make up.

Now it's not all bad news because now you know you can change it and help you and your relationships to grow.

The truth is the need to belong means we have to connect with someone or something to be the same. Perhaps this need created religion, bullying, culture divides, wars, the Higher Self, Enlightenment (As one.) Perhaps when you have found out about self - love these things just don't matter anymore because you are connected. Well not really connected just loved.

At the route of the design flaw is the need to be loved. We all have it, men and women alike hence we search for our soul mate, the other part to you so you can be one not two. I've done it on many occasions. Engaged in a relationship with a man who I believed was 'The One' and he wasn't. Left me asking the question is there really ever going to be 'The One' or will I become 'The One' and fall madly and deeply in love with me?

Um... It took a bit of persuading and a few lies told to me and told by me to help me understand yes, when you love yourself you are in fact whole emotionally. This feeds the need for connection beyond just communication and life becomes different. You find you have fewer friends but the friends you have are honest, loyal, and trustworthy and you actually enjoy giving them your time. You never feel or fear loneliness so you really enjoy your own company and the company of others when you are with them.

You break ties with so many connections, yet you begin to realise that these ties weren't ties they were lies. Lies you were told to make you feel good so you would stay their friend, in their life and sometimes their possession. (A whole new story comes from that.) Or lies you've told to protect your interests. You also form better quality sexual relationships with the right people who don't just have sex with you because they say they love you. (More to come in the future)

Actually let's look at being possessed for a moment. You become another person's possession or they may indeed become yours if you have fooled them how much you like or love them or even fooled yourself, obviously the most important person in all of this is you. (Again we will come to that later.) So for now think about a relationship, mother daughter, sister, brother, lover, friend whatever the right one will come to mind.

Now imagine if you were joined what would be joining you? Would it be, for example, a piece of barbed wire, an umbilical cord or maybe a piece of ribbon? You decide and as you do look at whether this tie is actually an honest healthy connection for both of you or is it really a restriction? Perhaps the tie is smothering you as is the person who says they love you but has too much fear to let you cut loose and grow and doesn't even know what true love is? Perhaps you are smothering them? It maybe that the wire is making it impossible for you to travel, leave home, move away or change jobs or let go of a lover? Maybe the umbilical cord is connecting you so much to your parent that your true identity is fast disappearing into theirs and this is making you unhappy?

Again you decide, no one is forcing change on you but if you do see the tie is more than a merely pleasant tie that could, if needs be, stretch or undo to let you both grow yet maintain a good empowering strong relationship for as long as time dictates it to be so, then is that really the kind of connection you want?

Well yes then carry on only be prepared for the kind of relationship that you have built. Life isn't easy to be by your lonesome and sometimes someone is better than no one, only not if that someone doesn't really fit and you've had to squash you and them to make the two of you connect together. You'll never be happy like that. Not really if you can see through the lie that you are already.

Imagine you are a piece of a puzzle and there is a perfect match for you, maybe the missing piece is a job, career, lover, new friend or new home, whatever you need your piece fits only one other piece. It has to come to you as you are the only piece that fits it and it is the only piece that fits perfectly your need. So if your piece is for self-acceptance don't expect the right piece to be someone who loves you unconditionally, although they might do, probably more likely to be someone who puts you down and down and down until the pain of not accepting yourself is so much worse than the leap of faith to start to discover that your self-esteem grows from you nurturing it not a man or woman.

Relationships built on trust last. Longevity comes from nurturing seeds that have been planted years, days, months or even weeks ago. Relationships built with truth and loyalty grows. Withering relationships come from fear that creates lies and this leads to poor health, mentally, emotionally, physically, spiritually and financially as the lies bleed you dry! Whereas ties feed you inside! (Health inside = health outside)

So next time you meet someone new and the lonely part of you decides to make them 'The One' again be it the boss, the lover, the friend, just take a breath.

Reassess why you have attracted this person. Will the relationship be created through lies, theirs and yours? Or will it be healthy from the start incorporating boundaries, friendships, trust and loyalty and a mutual respect?

Whatever the outcome, whatever you create or don't create you will grow.

Oh and if you don't know.

YOU ARE THE MOST SINGULARLY IMPORTANT PERSON IN YOUR WORLD, FOR WITHOUT YOU YOUR LIFE DOESN'T EXIST.

So if you truly understand that statement then you will start to look at yourself in a different light and worship no one not even yourself as you will have a heart. And as everyone knows the heart is where the love is not the head.

So if you don't understand it then attract me to guide you because my piece fits yours perfectly.

Julie-Ann Blackmore has over 30 years experience and varied training in bringing improvements to peoples, businesses and animals health and well being. She currently manages and owns her own business How To Be You that specializes in providing a large range of services and products to compliment Julie-Ann's wish to alleviate other's pain and suffering. From an early age Julie-Ann realised, among other things, that she was psychic and decided to develop this skill throughout her life and find ways of using it to heal others. Tuning into each individual she creates a finely tuned mix of skills and knowledge that offers the most benefits and shares this in many ways including Self Help e books, one to one sessions, talks and art. For more information, to order and purchase services and products and for free articles please visit http://www.howtobeyou.wordpress.com or contact Julie-Ann direct via email howtobeyou@hotmail.com