Improve Your Relationship Through the Timeless Wisdom of Vedic Compatibility Astrology

Relationships are one of the most important areas of life. The interplay between masculine and feminine energy is internal as well as external. The external relationship with our partner mirrors the internal relationship we have with these forces within ourself. Vedic relationship astrology is a remarkable system of scientific measurements, commonsense and holistic wisdom. Improving our external relationship, we improve our internal awareness and vice versa. Vedic astrology is deeply connected to the other Vedic sciences of yoga, ayurveda.

Both Western astrology and Vedic astrology uses the same planets, signs and houses. Yet, there are a few major differences between Western and Vedic astrology which reveal why Vedic Relationship astrology is so amazingly accurate.

Whereas Western astrology places importance on the Sun, Vedic astrology places more importance on the Moon. Vedic astrology uses 27 distant stars (called "Nakshatras") in the horoscope.

The Sun refers to our individual nature, not our desire to partner. Thus relationship compatibility must revolve around the moon, the planet of nurturing, vulnerability and receptivity. Vedic relationship astrology focuses mainly on the moons of the couple. Assessing the moons will reveal the flow of emotional energy and the quality of love flowing in the partnership. The moon is the planet of trust and comfort. It is related to our childhood, that time in life we are we were vulnerable. Based on this vulnerability we developed strengths, insecurities and complexes based on receiving things that felt good or bad. Throughout our life these strengths and weaknesses become modified, gently filtering our perceptions and attracting the experiences we feel ready to and worthy of receiving. We carry this fragile emotional psychology into our relationships. This is why when a person has a difficult childhood, they will repeat those difficulties in their relationships. It is because the Moon is what we are comfortable with, what is familiar to us. If turmoil is comfortable to us, that is what we seek in relationships. Astrologically, these emotional habits are shown by the Moon.

Vedic astrology uses 27 lunar signs as mentioned above. These 27 signs focus the subtle, refined emotional nature of each person with much more precision than 12 Western Sun signs. Yet within this increased precision there is even more refinement.

The "Ashta Kuta" (eight points) system classifies and compares each of these 27 archetypes based on more than ten criteria: (There are the 8 point giving Kutas and several other important comparisons)

* Friendliness with the other person's Moon ruler

* Temperament

* Sexual compatibility

* Vocation and caste

* Element and style (fiery, watery or airy)

* Capacity for receptivity and forgiveness

* Capacity to manifest externally as a couple, etc.

All of these criteria are actually applied to every planet in the chart adding a 10 fold strength just to the surface of Vedic Astrological compatibility. Through this subtlety it is possible to examine each planet.

In relationships the Planets show:

Sun - Our independence in the relationship

Moon - Our capacity to feel open and comfortable with the other person

Mars - Our strong ideas of how things should or shouldn't be in the relationship

Mercury - Our capacity to communicate and be flexible

Jupiter - Our common philosophies and principles, like values and religion

Venus - Our desire to experience pleasure with the partner and how we behave once the partner stops fulfilling us.

Saturn - Our need to feel safe, have proper boundaries and put in the necessary effort with the partner.

This amazing refined system shows all of the subtleties in human interaction, not just romantic relationships. It reveals why, perhaps you and your boyfriend have a good sex life, but cannot manifest anything outside of the bedroom. (High Gana Kuta, low Bhava Kuta). Or perhaps you share many interests in common but there is no spark, (High Graha Maitram, Low Yoni Kuta). Or perhaps you get along fine, but as soon as there is problem it is as if a whirlpool sucks you down into a maelstrom of confusion. (High Ashta Kuta points with Vedha or Rajju blemish)

To review:

* Vedic relationship astrology emphasizes the Moon, not the Sun

* Vedic relationship astrology uses 27 stars (Nakshatras) to delineate the planets with much more precision than twelve Sun Signs

* Vedic relationship astrology assess the 27 Star signs based on a ten-fold criteria to glean the subtle implications from each station in life.

This incredible level of accuracy is why they started arranging marriages thousands of years ago. It was not to oppress, it was to liberate and to help. It is no different than a nutritionist telling you what food is best for you or a counselor telling you which type of activities to avoid for increased peace and mental health. Once we learn to trust the universe again and restore the dignity to astrology, these truths will seem any more oppressive than a trusted doctor giving advice. Once rightly understood, Astrology is revealed to be an amazing tool for harmonizing our personal energy with the presiding universal wisdom that is all benevolent and leading us to the truth of who we really are.

Sam Geppi (Sadasiva) is a certified Vedic astrologer and author of "The Ascendant". He offers a free email course "Stellar Relationships" at Love Astrology which elucidates Vedic relationship astrology. He also offers a Free Daily Horoscope Podcast

The Compatibility Factor in Relationships - Seven Signs That You Are Right for Each Other (Or Wrong)

Are you looking for someone who is just right for you, but not sure where or how to find him or her? Many people say opposites attract. Maybe that is true, or maybe that is just what we are told as a way of explaining the "mystery" of relationships.

Being right for each other is more about having a "fit" of your personality, habits, and things you think are important. I call this the "compatibility factor". Here are seven forms of compatibility to look for in your relationship.

1. Personality Compatibility: Do you really get along, or find that you are silently irritated with the other person's personality? Are you uptight and your date is laid back? Think about if and how you will handle difficult days. Personality is a very important factor, and the most difficult to change.

2. Communication Compatibility: Are you direct or indirect? Does one of you do all the talking? Is one of you the silent type? Look at your conversations. Decide if they flow, and if they are enjoyable for you.

3. Friends and Family Compatibility: Do you get along with one another's friends and family, or is this a source of stress for your relationship?

4. Health and Nutrition Compatibility: Are you a health food nut or a junk food junkie? Is the only exercise you get channel surfing? Look at if your health-related lifestyles match or not.

5. Financial Compatibility: Are you generous or frugal with your money? How is your partner with their finances? Money is one of the things couples fight about most often. If you share similar financial goals and means, this can be very helpful.

6. Educational Compatibility: Some studies have found (and I have found in my experience and practice) that educational and world experience compatibility are important to many couples. People tend to feel the most comfortable with others who share similar life experiences, professional opportunities, and world views.

7. Intimate Compatibility: Ideas for romance, intimacy and closeness come into play here. One example is PDA (not a hand-held computer) but Public Display Of Affection. You may love to hug and kiss in public, and your date may think it's just wrong. Having a mismatched style can lead to resentments and have a long-term effect on your love life together.

I hope that you learned about some of the compatibility factors in your own relationship. So what can you do if you are not compatible? You can

1. Accept things as they are

2. Work on yourself and the relationship

Or

3. Leave the relationship.

If you opt for change, you can only change yourself. It's unreasonable to demand that the person in your life changes unless they want to. If you are in the dating and selection process, it is much more effective to choose a compatible partner now than it is to "fix" something that is "broken" later. Don't be afraid to let go if things are not working out. Sometimes love really is just not enough. Don't worry, there are millions of singles in the world to choose from, and you can find one that is compatible with you!

I invite you to access our free e-newsletter called the Sexuality Times at http://www.healingcouch.com . You can also take the Ultimate Compatibility Quiz by clicking here http://www.healingcouch.com if you wonder if you and your partner are compatible!

Compatibility and Relationships - How Do You Know If You Are Right For Each Other?

How do you know if you have found Mr. or Ms. Right for You? That is the key- finding a person that meshes with you. Before you commit, or decide you are "all in", here are some factors to consider:

1. Personal Compatibility: Do your personalities mesh? Do you enjoy one another's company? It is very important in a long-term relationship to be able to get along with each other's personality traits, quirks, strengths and weaknesses. Having personalities that are compatible is an essential ingredient in any workable and healthy relationship.

2. Intimacy Compatibility: How do you feel about PDA (Public Displays of Affection)? How close do you enjoy being with one another? If you are similar in your intimacy style, then you have a better chance of having a healthy and happy intimate life.

3. Sexual Compatibility: Sharing a similar sexual lifestyle, from frequency to sexual interests, can be extremely important in any relationship. While it may not be easy to find someone who shares your tastes and preferences, this is your potential life mate, so it's probably worth waiting for the right one.

4. Communications Compatibility: Does your communication style match well? If conversation flows in both directions, you may be on a good path in your relationship. On the other hand, if one of you does all the talking, then it may be a red flag that may cause problems in your relationship later. Since communication is such a key to any relationship, you will want to be sure that you have enough in common and enough to talk about that can sustain your relationship in the long term.

5. Friends & Family Compatibility: Do you and your partner enjoy and support one another's friends and family? If so, then great! If there are difficulties in this area beyond the normal uncertainties of being introduced to your new extended families. If you find great difficulty with your partner's friends and family, or if they criticize or isolate you from your support system, that may be a major red flag. If you need to work out any issues that arise with each other's friends and family, the main rule of thumb here is that the person whose family it is should handle all of the conflicts that arise.

6. Health & Nutrition Compatibility: It may seem small now, but it can be very important for couples to share similar health and nutrition lifestyles. The reason is that over time, things you may overlook now may really outrage you later. For example, a health enthusiast will likely become judgmental of a junk food junkie or couch potato over time. You are better off finding someone who is more similar with your interests in lifestyles. Otherwise, what you eat becomes a constant power struggle.

7. Household Compatibility: Finding someone who shares a similar lifestyle and household vibe can be a relationship enhancer. Mr. Clean and Ms. Messy may not get along very well. Level of neatness, if compatible, can really enhance your sense of well being, especially since your home is your sanctuary.

8. Financial Compatibility: Although you don't have to earn the same amount, couples who can communicate openly and freely about finances tend to fare better over time. Another financial consideration is whether or not you share visions and goals about how you choose to spend and invest your money, particularly if you are going to share your lives and pool your funds.

9. Interest Compatibility: It is amazing to share interests together as a couple, whether it is travel, a sport, art, gourmet cooking or something else. I have found that couples who play together, stay together. Couples who have very little in common tend to drift apart over time, once the newness of the relationship has worn off. If you really love each other, but don't have interests, then develop one!

These are some areas of compatibility that you can look for in your relationship. May you find the love of your life! I hope these tips have been helpful to you in finding Mr. or Ms. Right for You!

I invite you to access our free e-newsletter called the Sexuality Times at http://www.healingcouch.com You can also take the Ultimate Compatibility Quiz by clicking here http://www.healingcouch.com if you wonder if you and your partner are compatible!

Relationships - Physical Compatibility

How important is physical compatibility in relationships? Well, it depends on the couple. For some people their physicality is of utmost importance to them. When it is, they often want their partner to engage in many of their activities with them. For some couples the physical nature of their relationship is not important to either of them. And for some couples, if one rates the physical aspect high and the other one doesn't, happy satisfied couples have found ways to satisfy that physical element outside of their relationship.

I have done research with couples who self-identify as happy and satisfied after being together at least ten years. One area I ask about is their satisfaction in the physical area. This can encompass many things. It can mean sexual compatibility. It can mean being satisfied with each other's overall health and level of activity. It can translate into satisfaction with romance or public displays of affection or lack thereof. It could mean satisfaction with one's partner's physical appearance.

The one aspect of physical compatibility that seems to be most important is sexual compatibility. The vast majority of the couples I interviewed reported not having other intimate relationships outside of their committed one. They also reported a healthy sex life, well into their later years.

As author, Kevin Lehman writes in his book Sheet Music, sex in a marriage is very important and necessary to a man. He believes a woman who denies her man enthusiastic involvement in the sexual act is like a man who refuses to talk to his partner. As a general rule, women need communication and men need physical connection. That is not to say women don't enjoy sex and men don't like to communicate. It's just the general trend among the genders.

I also interviewed couples who both reported sex was no longer a part of their relationship and they were both at peace with that fact. I even interviewed one couple who were married as heterosexuals. He underwent a sex change operation and is now a woman. They have remained a lesbian couple and the wife also satisfies her sexual desires with a man and her partner fully sanctions that activity.

Other aspects of the sexual area to consider are frequency, duration and creativity. All of these are things that couples should discuss and come to agreement about. If one person wants to explore all manner of sexual activity with his or her partner and the other partner is interested only in the missionary position, then that relationship may be in for some rocky roads.

Romance, foreplay and public displays of affection are also areas where it is helpful to find agreement with your partner.

Compatibility in the sexual area is critical to relationship success but the level of activity is defined by the couples themselves.

Sometimes couples highly value the external appearance of their partner. They want the partner whose look is pleasing to him or her. I interviewed a couple who are both 88 years old, married 56 years. When they were married, the husband loved the way his wife looked. Her beauty was very important to him and he referred to her as his "pin up girl." Do you know now, 56 years later, he still refers to her as his "pin up girl"? That is a man who was able to adjust and expand his physical expectations to match the maturation of their relationship. Contrast that with a person who gets together with his or her partner based strictly on external beauty. Once that beauty begins to fade, as it inevitably will, he or she will be looking for the next partner to replace the aging one. For some couples, the outer beauty of a person is not important for either of them. And for still other couples, external beauty is of the utmost importance and they are very conscious of their weight, nutrition and may have cosmetic surgery to assist in maintaining their beauty.

A final area to look at is health and fitness. What I found in my research is that for many people who value this aspect of life, they were attracted to partners who did also. This makes the relationship smooth in this area. They often engage in common activities of fitness. They may like to hike, bike, swim, lift weights, and go to the gym together. They may even engage in their activities with other people and that is fine as long as they are maintaining their overall health and fitness. They also generally agree on their nutritional choices.

If this is an area that is not important to either couple, then there is no issue here and they are compatible in their indifference to health and fitness. What challenges and potentially strains a relationship is when one person values this and the other doesn't. I saw this more with older couples where one partner was perhaps more overweight and in poorer health. One person becomes worried about their partner's health and mortality.

The bottom line is that different things work for different couples. While some highly value aspects of this physical area and want their partners to value it too, some couples are able to enjoy the aspects of their physical life that are important to them while allowing their partner to do what's important to him or her. And there are yet other couples who do not value this area at all. The couples who reported being happy and satisfied with their relationship did not have conflict in this area. Either they were compatible in this area or they simply allowed each other to fully express themselves in this area as they saw fit.

To learn more about relationships check out my Relationships from the Inside Out products.

Kim Olver is a life, relationship and executive coach. Her mission is to help people get along better with the important people in their lives. She teaches people how to live from the inside out by empowering them to focus on the things they can change. She in an internationally recognized speaker, having worked in Australia and the continent of Africa, as well as all over the United States. She is the creator of the new, revolutionary process called, Inside Out Empowerment based on Glasser's ideas. She has consulted with the NBA and other major league player development specialists.

She is the author of Leveraging Diversity at Work and the forthcoming book, Relationship Empowerment. She co-authored a book with Ken Blanchard, Les Brown, Mark Victor Hansen and Byron Katie, entitled 101 Great Ways to Improve Your Life. She works with individuals, couples, parents, social service agencies, schools, corporations and the military--anyone who will benefit from gaining more effective control over their lives. She has consulted on relationships, parenting, self-development, training, leadership development, diversity, treatment programs and management styles.